Randomness by Amy

Okay, so it ended up being 224 days.....

2007-11-20T19:59:00.001-08:00

I admit it - I'm a Myspace junkie and I've totally neglected this blog. That's if I even have time to log onto Myspace anymore...... It's the same old story, though ;-) Working too much..... sleeping when I'm not working..... Unpacking boxes and painting our new house. Oh yeah, we bought our first home!!!

I'm having the time of my life in this home. Erik and I were just discussing that we finally feel home. It's our home. It's already brought us closer and we've learned a few new things about each other. Like how I'm not the best painter in the world, but that's a whole other story ;-) Anways, it's been such a blast moving into our own place and settling in. It's roomy, warm and I have an enormous bathtub!

Anyways, dinner won't cook itself so I'm outta here. I wonder how long it'll be before I write again........

78 Days

2007-04-11T20:43:00.000-07:00

Is that really how long it's been since I've last posted something??? Really???

I guess it's time then! Life has obviously been moving at a rapid pace w/o a lot of time for blogging, mainly because of the start of spring and my new job. I'm enjoying learning new things and being a part of something unique, but I'll admit, I have no desire to sit down and think some more when I get home in the evening ;-) I'll write more about my new job later......

In other news........

It's almost hydroplane racing season!!! Our first race is in Moses Lake on the 28th and 29th. So very stoked to get Powerful JuJu back in the water, complete with upgrades and repairs. Oh! And a newly modified trailer that is safe for driving through Kittatas!! (that's for those of you who know - thanks for the memories on the side of I90, but hopefully we won't be repeating history). I'll be posting many many photos of cool racing fun this summer, and hopefully maybe even some video clips with sound, thanks to Erik's new video camera!

Next order of business is Saucy's Pizza. Saucy's is a pizza and sandwich restaurant on south Whidbey Island. Go there. Take the ferry from Mukilteo. Eat tons of pizza and drink a few beers. Why? Because it's the best damn pizza or pulled pork sandwich you'll ever have!!! Especially because it's now owned by the Hadlocks!! That's right...... Erik's parents bought it and Jeff, Erik's dad is not only one of the owners, but head chef as well, and lemme tell ya, I could eat his cooking forever. So, check it out!!

And lastly, just because I feel like letting the world know...... I'm good. I'm really, really good. No, my life isn't perfect. In fact, it's far from it. But I am so blessed to have what I have. A unique but loving family that always surprise me, a loyal and remarkable boyfriend that keeps me laughing, friends that lookout for me and never confuse my silence for anything other than what it is, a boss who is willing to take the time to teach me things I may not necessarily get the chance to learn otherwise, a car to drive (even though it's on loan) and my health. I have all that I need to be loved and happy...... to have less stress and do the things I want to do in this world, I need more money, but that'll come. Right now, I am so very satisfied with who I am and who I know I will become.

Had enough introspective, self-awareness talk? Me too!!

I had forgotten how great it feels to "talk" to the anonymous world. It won't be 78 days before the next time I ramble on and on ;-)

INTERVIEW TIME!

2007-01-23T10:22:00.000-08:00

There is a fantastic opportunity just waiting for me..... I have an interview today with a really great, very sucessfull company in Fife. It's funny, it's right down the street from BMW Northwest, which is where Erik works ;-) Anyways, there's a plan already in place for this position to advance in July, it comes with a great salary, full benefits and this place even has an HR Department! (unlike my last job).

I'm super duper excited for this interivew. A little nervous too, just because I really have to put myself out there and hope they like me.

So, wish me luck!

Off I go!

Winter is here!

2006-12-21T17:13:00.000-08:00

It's funny.....I blog less now that I'm unemployed ;-)

Life has just been busy. Good, but busy. The wind storm threw off my schedule a few days, so I'm playing catch up (thus, why I just finished my Christmas shopping today!). On my way right now over to my dad's, where my family and Erik are celebrating our Christmas. My dad is joining Jeff and Mary down in Oregon with her folks and Erik and I will be with his family on Christmas Eve. Holiday plans are usually difficult to coordinate, but this year it has gone quite smoothly!

And.... we're going to attempt to drive up in the mountains this weekend to go play in the snow! We were going to go on my birthday last Sunday, but the wind storm kinda shifted our plans. I can't wait to throw a snowball at Erik ;-)

I can't even say how much I'm looking for the new year to get here. After the holidays, I can really start looking for a place to live in Tacoma (oh yeah, I'm moving Jan 31st!) and I can also begin interviewing like crazy for a job. I CAN'T WAIT to start working again. I mean, sure, sleeping in is great, but I'm bored and ready to start taking in more $$$.

Anyways! Gotta run! Stuffed Mushrooms won't make themselves :-)

Have a Merry Christmas everyone!!!

Stranded for a few days

2006-12-01T11:41:00.000-08:00

Snow is probably one of my most favorite things in the whole wide world. I love the way it looks falling out of the sky...... I love how it makes our yards white playgrounds and our ski resorts crowded. But when I got stuck down in Federal Way for 3 days while I5 was covered in ice, I wasn't liking the pre-winter storm so much. Don't get me wrong, I loved hanging out with Erik for a few days and just relaxing, but after a while, sitting in a cold apartment without the internet can get a little old ;-) So it feels good to be back home with my heating blanket, my computer and my fridge. The storm was fun to watch from inside and on the news and I'm glad I didn't really have to be anywhere at all this week.

But I do have places to be this weekend, so I'm glad it's cleared up a little!!! Tomorrow we're getting up really early to go to the last Pro Rally Race of the year in Shelton. And although rally races are really fun in the rain and mud, I'm glad it's not supposed to rain.... since later than afternoon, we're heading to to the Sheraton in Tacoma to get ready for the BMW Christmas party!! AND! I'm wearing a cocktail dress!! For those who know me pretty well, wearing a dress is not a common thing (I think it's actually been since Homecoming my junior year in highschool since I've worn a cocktail dress). But the black dress I found is fabulous and I'm excited to have fun tomorrow night ;-)

Gobble Gobble!

2006-11-22T22:30:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! My cousin Mindy and her husband Wayne are throwing the party at their place in Bellingham and the whole fam is going to be there. I'm pretty excited to see some family I don't get to see very often. Erik and I are headed up there tomorrow afternoon!

And so it starts..... Turkey day is here, we're starting next Saturday going to one last Rally Race in Shelton and ending the same evening with the formal BMW Christmas party. My brother's birthday, my 25th birthday, Christmas and New Years. All in the next 39 days.

But I love it ;-)

Discovery

2006-10-27T12:18:00.000-07:00

While flipping through channels, I ran across the movie The Village. I remember it being strange and creepy, but intriguing, so I settled in to watch. It still had its moments of bad acting and weird storyline twists, yet this time, I found myself listening more to the music than anything else. I ended up looking up the soundtrack on Rhapsody and when I found it, I found a mesmerizing song......It's called "The Gravel Road".

There's a sense of urgency to it that I can't explain. I stirs up all sorts of stuff in me...... tenderness, hope, conflict, faith, introspect, panic, resolution

Even now, days later, I can't stop listening to it. I can lose myself in this song. I feel empowered by it. I feel it's an expression of what I've been feeling since I lost my mom. The musical interpretation of my heart.

Amazing how one song can move so deeply.

2 Hours

2006-10-19T09:03:00.000-07:00

My commute this morning was from Federal Way to Kirkland
Distance: 31.58 Miles
Average Travel Time: 37 minutes
TODAY'S TRAVEL TIME: 2 HOURS

Let's do some comparisons, just for kicks.

Kirkland to Olympia: 69.21 Miles
Travel Time: 1 Hour, 15 Minutes
Kirkland to Bellingham 86.7 Miles
Travel Time: 1 hour, 32 Minutes
Kirkland to Ellensburg: 107.31 Miles
Travel Time: 1 Hour, 45 Minutes

That's why I'm moving down to the south end.....I'm apartment and job hunting as we speak!!

Oh, and I'll have some recent photos to post later today. It feels like it's been a while ;-)

The Change-Up

2006-10-09T15:51:00.001-07:00

Shifting. Tweaking. Turning. Improving. Adjusting. That's what life is doing right now.... Just when I think I'm headed on one direction, life turns on its heel and charges in the opposite direction, paying no attention to how I feel about it. Not saying it's all bad, just saying that it's scary at times. I was expecting a fast ball and I got a breaking ball, low and inside.

I lost my job at UBuildIt. And no, I won't go into details.......it's nobody's business. But in my humble opinion, it was partly my fault and partly circumstance. I am UBuildIt's, what, 8th casuality this year? My boss and I were discussing my promotion and raise on Monday and by that Wednesday I was packing up my desk. The only thing that truly stresses me out is the money and I stressed about money when I had a job, so I'm chosing to have a sense of humor and know that if I hold onto the nice severance package I walked out of there with, I'll be alright. I'm always alright :-) And in all actuality, I am turning a job loss into an opportunity to make some big changes......

I'm going to finally finish college! I have a direction, a school, a degree and a new career in mind. More on that later though. My goal is to start winter quater in January, but we'll see how the timing of finding part-time work, financial aid and a new place to live, all right around the the holidays. Ooooo, nice segway!

I think I'm moving to the south end to be closer to Erik!!! We've always said that if we had the chance to eliminate the 40 mile, 1 way commute inbetween us, we should. I'll be in Kirkland through the end of the year and then I'll probably live in Federal Way. I've already started apartment shopping.......We're going to wait on living together for now, which feels right to both of us. Man, we'd be happy not to sit in rush hour traffic for 2 hours just to have dinner together.

So I come back to my original point. Life changes in a moment. And I'm just choosing to be as ready as I can for curve balls........ and the homeruns.

So I really don't believe in daily horoscopes, but....

2006-09-20T16:59:00.000-07:00

I still look at it from time to time. Today, my horoscope didn't predict anything or tell me big money was in the stars for me.....

But it did remind me to appeciate the good in my life, as well as the bad. Here's what it said:

"Not all of the important changes in your life need to be dramatic, Hollywood-like moment of revelation. Having a major turning point or epiphany is nice, but it can be overrated. You don't need to make a splash to make a change. True growth happens slowly...... so slowly that sometimes (like now) you might not even be aware of it. Look around today - did you realize that right now, you're in one of the biggests transitional periods of your life? Let it unfold and enjoy it."

What hit me was "True growth happens slowly". I can't even count how many times I've tried to make a major lifestyle change (exercise more, clean more often, get more sleeping, etc) and failed, because I expected my life to change quickly.

I needed a reminder that even though I don't have it all figured out, I have time.

Time to evolve. Time to get it right. Time to become my authentic self.

I don't have forever, but I do have time.

;-)

Brand Spankin' New

2006-09-19T08:52:00.000-07:00

Ever since I moved out of my parent's home, I've had a "hand-me-down" or used TV. The last one was an old Zenith....... one of the heavy ones encased in wood that weighed more than a 5th grader. Well that tv and I started to have issues when it wouldn't turn on the first try. Or the second. Or the fifteenth. Most of the time, by the eighteenth try it would come on like normal, with a great picture and sound and everything. But after months of battling, it was time.

I looked on Craig's list for a used tv, but decided that I would get what I paid for and I wanted something worth while.

So I put my big girl panties on, went to Fred Meyer and purchased my first ever, brand new tv! It was a little more than I wanted to spend, but decided that was okay, since I'm going to have this tv for years to come. It's a 27'' Sylvania Digital Flat Screen, TV/DVD/VCR Combo....... and I love it :-)

The archaic Zenith went BYE BYE in the dumpster and my new TV is fabulous!

Yes I know, I may seem overly excited over a TV. I guess I'm just easily amused, what can I say?

:=)

Go Hawks!

2006-09-08T16:41:00.000-07:00

It's finally football season!

Lions are goin' down on Sunday..... I can just feel it. Seahawks by 2 TD's.

:-)

(BOOYAH!!! Okay, so it wasn't the prettiest game ever, but it's a win people!)

Fall...... it's coming

2006-08-09T07:44:00.000-07:00

I just need to say that I'm so excited for Fall. I love the Summer sunshine and the nights that last forever..... it's just that I love foggy mornings, the cool breeze and having a cup of soup for breakfast. I enjoy snuggling up under heavy blankets with the window wide open letting the chilly air in.

Life will also slow down in the coming weeks....... I may finally be able to spend a whole weekend at my own home! Maybe even sleep in past 8am :-) I'm am so grateful for the things I have been able to do this summer. Erik and I have gone on a dozen camping trips, seen parts of Washington we didn't even know existed, vacationed in Mexico and were there to see my brother get married, raced hydroplanes, floated down a river, gone to his 10 year high school reunion, gone to a few rally races, sailed around the San Juans in a huge sailboat w/ my family..... I wouldn't have traded a moment of it.

It's just that Fall gives me time. Time to think...... time to do......time to see old friends..... time to just be.

2006-07-13T20:30:00.000-07:00

"Humor is just another defense against the universe"
- Mel Brooks

Without the people in my life that make me laugh both with them and at myself, I think I would have lost my marb les a long time ago. You people rock.

:-)

Oh The Possibilities

2006-07-11T07:48:00.000-07:00

Big things are happening, people. BIG things :-) It's just too soon to spout any details yet......we all know deals have a way of falling through.

But! If things work out, life could be changing in so many good ways :-) I promise that I'll say more when we have more assurance under my belt. Don't mean to tease, I'm just so excited that I had to let y'all know.

Prayers are always welcome...... pray for wide open doors, open-minded loan officers and willing partners.

Thank you!

Is it Time?? I think it's Time!

2006-07-06T14:15:00.000-07:00

Phew! I actually have time today to update this…… it’s been a few moons, huh? Well, here goes! Got a few mins?

Mexico
It was fabulous…..absolutely everything I needed and more. Erik and I had the chance to relax together in romantic Cabo San Lucas. We spent long evenings out on the balcony, enjoying the nice sunsets………we went for walks on the beach and watched the enormous waves crash on the rocks…….we ate all sorts of great food, went on a glass-bottom boat ride, explored the open markets and took walks through the marina. My brother’s wedding was also fantastic! Everything was so romantic and simple…… the scenery of the beach and ocean behind the wedding party was all the decorating they needed J The ceremony was sweet, brief and pretty tearful. I was behind Jeff so I got to see Mary’s expressions as she vowed to love my brother for as long she lived – which was amazing…. SHE is amazing. Then, the party got started! Great food, great music and good planning made the party a huge success. I’ve posted some awesome photos on my photo blog – check ‘em out!

Tastin’ N Racin’ Hydro Race at Lake Sammamish – June 10th
It was a last minute scramble to get the engine rebuilt in time for the 2nd day of racing, but we did it! We headed out from Whidbey Island early Sunday morning and made it down to the lake with plenty of time (and right as all the muscle cars were pulling into the field! Ahhhhhh…… there’s nothing better than the sound of a dozen throaty motors). Anyways, Erik was driving that day so we got him registered and his nurse’s check done and did last minute things until it was time to race – and man oh man – it’s so exciting to watch Erik launch and start the motor J The first heat started out really strong! He ran in 3rd place most of the way and the only 2 boats in front of him were larger, 7.5 liter boats (we’re 4.5 liter)!!! WOOHOO! He probably would have won, but on the last lap, he made the choice to cut the engine due to the rising temperature of the motor. We pulled out it and took a look – all was well. Or so we thought. He wasn’t able to make it out to the course for the second heat L Oh well – engine’s break and sometimes there ain’t a damn thing we can do about it. So, we packed up and headed home. Better luck next time! But it was still fun to see Erik FLYING around on that course. Check out the photos here.

Fourth of July – 4 days weekend
Erik and I had started planning our Washington state Camping/Road trip/Exploration-of Ghost-Town-Excursion for weeks! We had originally planned to explore Southeast Washington, a place neither of us had spent much time in, but when we got out past Yakima, we were bored (it was Highway 24 – I DO NOT recommend it). There’s nothing out there – just hills and long, straight, boring roads. Oh, but seeing how hops grow for the first time was cool. So we decided to head up north on Highway 17 towards Moses Lake. We camped that first night in a National Wildlife Refuge Area after getting a permit from some campground. It was beautiful, but we didn’t realize just how many bugs would be present L But it worked out good since we kept the doors of the tent closed at all times. The sunrise was completely unreal….. it was so fascinating to hear nature wake up little by little. As soon as the light started appearing in that pale blueish hue, I heard a few fish start jumping – and as it got lighter and lighter, the fish jumped higher and higher and the birds got louder and louder. I forgot how relaxing it is just to sit through a whole sunrise. We got out of there pretty quick, since the bugs started attacking again and headed back out on the road.

THEN, we headed up Highway 21 towards the Columbia to take a free, open air ferry, through Ferry County and on to Republic. We checked out a few Ghost Towns in Ferry County, on our way to Highway 395, which took us north, following the Burlington-Northern Railroad tracks to Orient, a small ghost town we had some information on. Mostly just old buildings that were falling down, but it was still creepy and cool. From there, we went west on this looooooong road that followed right along with the US-Canadian border, which was kinda cool. We followed that from Ferry County through Okanogan County all the way to Chesaw, WA. We stopped at their old cemetery, which was eerie and pretty cool to see (lots of gravesites from the mid 1800’s). After that, we stayed at a really cool campground and swam in the lake and made uber yummy, greasy camp food. Good times…… good times…..

So this would take us to Monday morning, July 3rd. We made our way through the Okanogan National Forest, stopping at anything cool we saw. We found Loomis, yet another ghost town and started on the Loomis-Oroville road. Well, we took a wrong turn somewhere and ended up on Forest Service Road 23, which later changed to 27 and meandered up and down and up and down through the forest. That’s when things turned upside down L We were heading back down the last pass for the night, driving kinda fast, hitting some unexpected potholes and bad road conditions. Erik slowed down and just when we thought things were good, we hit a small bump and heard a CRUNCH. Opps! I prayed for a flat tire, but when Erik got out and took a look, we realized it was much worse than that. The lower ball joint, a major steering component, had shattered and metal was grinding on metal. ICK. It was 8pm, we were up about 7000 feet in the mountains, MILES from Winthrop, in bear country. Our options were hike about 25 miles out of here, stay the night in the truck or fix it somehow. Well, Erik is a genius and he devised a way to get out of there. He lodged a rock in between some parts and secured it with 2 bungee cords. He wasn’t that hopeful about it working, but it did!!! The only problem is that we had to inch out of there, and I mean, really inch at 4 miles an hour. It was painstaking working……and our adrenaline was pumping. We drove like that from 10pm to 1am and finally stopped to get some sleep. We started again and 4:30am and made it into Winthrop around 7:30 (after the rock had fallen out about 5 times. Each time, we had the jack the truck up, reposition and secure the rock back in and lower the truck down, inch by inch). We made a good team though! It took 6 hours but with Erik’s ingenious idea and my watchful eye keeping a lookout for hungry bears, we made it back to town w/o injury. PHEW! Erik called his parents to ask if they could come out and pick us up. They said, “No prob! You guys have bailed us out a few times now when the hydro trailer fell apart, we can repay the favor”. (which we were SO grateful for). Erik and I waited a few hours while they drove the 200+ miles from Whidbey Island to Winthrop. Poor Erik’s truck……it’s still there, in the public parking lot, waiting for Erik’s dad to come out w/ a hitch and tow it home, which he’s doing today. ANYWAYS! It wasn’t really the ending of road trip we had hoped for, but we’re all safe and had a fabulous first couple days! I’ve posted all the cool photos on my photo blog.

WOW! I think that’s it! It’s kinda nice to write all that down. Good memories and very fun times in the last couple months. I’m so thankful for the people in my life that I can do those very cool things with and depend upon when I’m in need.

And the summer just keeps on rollin’ by! It’s going so fast….. Erik’s 10 year high school reunion is this weekend, we’re headed back to Winthrop to do our annual river float w/ a bunch of friends, my dad is chartering a sailboat for a few weeks – so Erik and I will meet ‘em up in Bellingham or the San Juans for a weekend getaway. I’m loving life right now….. no, it’s not perfect, but it’s fulfilling to be involved with so many things.

Hopefully my next post won’t have to be novel-sized!!!

Have a great summer everyone!

Oh me oh my

2006-06-23T16:56:00.000-07:00

Life has been taking unexpected turns lately.......some positive & some negative, but all things that have kept me away from writing here........ I haven't even written about my trip last month to Mexico for my brother's wedding. Or the last two hydro races. Or about anything else for that matter :-)

What's a girl to do?

I need to find a nice free, quiet evening, pour a glass of red wine, put on Norah Jones and write my little heart out. When? I don't know. But it'll be a doozie!

Hope y'all are doing well.....bye for now.

Opps!

2006-06-10T10:48:00.000-07:00

Mexico trip post coming soon, I promise. I actually wrote it all out one day and when I tried to post, my computer started having "techincal difficulties" and I lost it all! Of course! So, I'm almost done but can't finish today 'cause I don't have the photos on the computer I'm at.

Plus, it's Tastin' n Racin' weekend and we're doing last minute work on Powerful JuJu so we can make it down to Lake Sammamish tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed, people! It's going to be a full day of engine assembly :-)

Stay tuned....

Back Home

2006-05-29T01:05:00.000-07:00

Just got in from a fantastic vacation and it's 1am........so, I'll finish this tomorrow :-)

Buenos Noches!

Leavin' on a Jet Plane...... Don't Know When I'll Be Back Again....

2006-05-23T07:27:00.000-07:00

Well, I'll be back Sunday....work with me here :-)

Erik and I are headed off to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico! My brother is gettin' hitched to a fabulous woman named Mary and decided to say their vows on the beach..... therefore creating a wonderful excuse for a vacation for friends and family.

We're staying at a fantastic hotel on the Baja Penninsula and our only set plan is the wedding on Thursday. I have a feeling that the rest of the time, we'll be chillin' out in the pool, swimming up to the in-pool bar, having handsom mexican boys wait on us hand and foot and relaxing to our heart's content. Oh, and maybe a massage on the beach and walking in the surf at sunset, too....ya know, just to get the full effect :-)

Knowing me, I'll take copious amounts of photos, so I'll post 'em when I get back.

ADIOS AMIGOS!

Going Racin'

2006-05-05T12:35:00.000-07:00

Early tomorrow morning, and I do mean early.......4am..... Erik and I are heading out to Banks Lake, Washington for the first Hyrdoplane race of the season! We're meeting his parents at the Sunbanks Resort, which is also where we're staying for the night.

It'll be a great time....we always have a good time with that crowd. Gorgeous scenery, lots of campfires, lots of beer and lots of fun. Powerful JuJu is all ready to go! Should be a great time..... hopefully the weather holds out, since it's absolutely gorgeous right now.

I'll post photos and maybe some video next week (if I can figure out how to post video, that is).

Here's a pic just for fun....

Closeness

2006-04-27T08:26:00.000-07:00

After my mom passed my dad gave me a few of her personal things.....which I am so, so, so grateful for. I think the items I like the most are two of her watches and I wear one of them every day. One is two-tone yellow gold and silver and the other is only silver, which is the one I normally wear since yellow gold and I don't match very well.

Well, I was putting on the two-tone one this morning and when it touched my skin, just for a brief second, I could feel her. I sensed her love and almost felt as if I was being gently hugged. No, I don't think her ghost was there actually in the room, hugging me. This was a feeling that originated much deeper within me and lasted only a fleeting moment and then was gone. It brought a tear to my eye and I remembered how much I loved her hugs......even though she would inadvertently dig her fingers into my sides and crush my chest so hard it ached :-)

I'd give up so much just for one more hug. Guess I'll have to wait until my time. Until then, I thank God that I have little moments where I feel close to her again......

SIGH Why Did it Have to End?

2006-04-24T14:08:00.000-07:00

I'm convinced that nature is God's version of Prozac or therapy, at least for me. He created so many gorgeous things in this world......mountains, old growth trees, little sparrows, lush forests, hot sunshine and valleys. We went camping this weekend, if you couldn't guess :-) The Oregon Rally Group was putting on the annual Oregon Trail Rally in central and coastal Oregon. Erik and I went, along with a few of his co-workers and their friends or fiances. We had such a blast driving around in the woods, finding cool spots to take pictures and even more fun, finding interesting, hidden places to "relieve ourselves".

The weekend started off with a nice, long drive from Federal Way to Hillsboro, Oregon. We stayed at a place called Horning's Hideout, where Erik and I have stayed a few times before. I've probably mentioned the peacocks in the past :-) Anyways! We built a great fire and tried to stay warm. Horning's Hideout is WAY down a the bottom of a ravine so it was quite cold.....but it was worth it for the scenery. The owners had set up our firepit and even left us a tuplip on the table..... We will definitely be back again next year!

We were up with the sun on Saturday morning and started out with breakfast, which was Fried Piles (a bacon/egg/english muffin meal made Hadlock style). We then went to Hillsboro Stadium to see all the Rally Cars lined up and ready to go. THEN, it was a long drive out to the Tillamook National Forest to start the mayhem :-) My heartbeat jumped when I heard the first car about a mile away from us, roaring down the logging roads. The first few cars are always the fastest and give us spectators a thrill with loud entries, flying rocks and tons of billowing dust. GOOD STUFF. There was a long wait until the next pass through that corner, so we all piled in our trucks and headed up a really steep hill, up to the top of a mountain. There, we had an ariel view of a few sweeping turns, which was awesome despite the fact the cars were kinda far away. We fired up the grill and made yummy burgers and drank tons of beer. Oh and the sunshine!!! We were probably up oh, about a thousand feet or more and it was still over 70! Erik got a sunburn on his neck and face, as did the rest of us. We built complicated rock towers, played with Charlotte (the little Jack Russell that was hanging out with us), ate grubbin' camp food and enjoyed the fresh air without all the distractions of life. Wonderful. Best time ever. Didn't have a care in the world. I wasn't thinking about work or money or my mom or my weight or my issues with friends or anything else....... complete relaxation. Won't ever forget it :-)

Phew! As if that wasn't enough fun, we headed out towards a campsite Erik and I had been a few times. We found a site all nestled back into some trees and got settled in. After getting all our tents set up and things put away, we settled around a huge fire, roasting brauts, drinkin' cheap beer and munchin' on goodies....great times.....beautiful scenery with HUGE trees and a cool river nearby.

We ended up walking down to that river early Sunday morning......it was breathtaking. The sun was hot already, even at 8 in the morning and the breeze coming off the river was just perfect! Eventually, we noticed we were actually at a spot where 3 rivers came together and joined forces, which was cool. Charlotte loved trying to nip at the little shore waves and the boys got a kick out of trying to build rock towers using oddly shaped rocks :-) I took a ton of photos, but not all were digital so I can't post some of the coolest ones here.

The rally race on Sunday wasn't quite as exciting as it was on Saturday, but that's not unusual. After exploring logging roads and cool dirt trails, we finally decided it was time for one last grilled burger and than we needed to make the long trek back up I5.

This last weekend couldn't have been more perfect if I had planned it myself. The people we were with were great, the food was excellent, the rally was good, the weather was incredible, we slept great and got to ignore email, cell phones, traffic and the news....... perfection. All I could do on the way home is recap everything we had done and thank God for creating such a fun place to explore.

I am refreshed........ 100% rejuvenated and ready to take on the next thing..

I've been trying to post photos here but Blogger is apparently having trouble uploading photos........ again.

Oh well! I'll try to post 'em this week sometime.

Time to work now!!

Wanna See Something Really Cool?

2006-04-06T13:46:00.000-07:00

Check out this link: http://www.youtube.com/w/Pikes-Peak-Peugeot-(-Impresionante-)?v=nCgs1LbQtJg&search=mustang%20turbo%20diesel%20truck%20hp%20drag%20race%20strip

You must have Macromedia Flash Player 8 to view it. You may be able to download for free, I'm not sure.

Anyways, check it out if you want a mini-thrill through the eyes of a race car driver :-)

(It's best viewed with sound - and turn it up!)

:-)

Spontaneous Sunday Morning

2006-04-03T12:44:00.000-07:00

Well, I think it’s safe to say that Erik and I hate being indoors. Why? Because on Sunday morning at around 3am, we were woken up and couldn’t go back to sleep. It was actually about 4am because of the time change, but anyways. We didn’t want to drive down to his place in Federal Way since he had to be in Everett later and neither of us could fall back asleep anyways. SO! We went for a drive! Seems to be our specialty :-)

We had originally decided to head up to the pass and watch the sunrise……..well, we ended up in Ellensburg and drove all around in the mountains. The sunrise was gorgeous, as you can see.

We had a blast just driving around on bumpy dirt roads, munching on goodies and chatting about this and that.

After exploring some mountains and roads (one of which we couldn’t continue on because of a deep stream right in our way), we decided to head back west. I ended up napping and after a while and I guess Erik was tired too, since we stopped at a rest stop and took a nap. As you can see, it was very bright and Erik wanted to cover his eyes :-)

On our way back, we stopped at Snoqualmie Falls and took a few photos. Neither of us had been there for a long time – it was SO beautiful.

Anyways, it as a great way to spend an early Sunday morning……. Out in the fresh mountain air. I would encourage anyone who can’t fall back asleep in the wee hours of the morning to throw on a coat, get in your car and find a great place to watch the sunrise. It was refreshing to say the least.

Can anyone believe it’s APRIL 5th already?!?!?!

April marks the start of another busy, yet really fun summer……

Upcoming Events:
PNB presents Sleeping Beauty – April 15th (a gift from Erik’s grandparents)
Oregon Trail Rally – April 21-23rd
First Hydro Race – Banks Lake, WA – May 6-7

Photos of Project Little JuJu

2006-03-24T15:20:00.000-08:00

Check out the new hydroplane!!!

http://amyspicturecollection.blogspot.com/

It's going to be a kick ass summer! Two boats, two drivers and lots and lots of racin'.......can't get much better than that.

Also, check out the website for Tastin' n Racin' 2006 at http://www.tastinracin.com/. We probably won't have both boats running, but beefy Powerful JuJu will be going for sure! Hope to see you there! Beer garden, cover bands, carnival food, a classic car show on Sunday, a beer garden, lots of loud hydroplanes, sunshine, a beer garden :-)

Stay tuned for more hydro news as it comes available!

2006-03-20T07:23:00.000-08:00

"An optimist is the human personification of spring."

Susan J. Bissonette

Happy Spring Everyone!

Just when ya think.......

2006-03-15T08:13:00.000-08:00

Got knocked off my feet last night while talking to my dad.....

We were making plans to get together as family next weekend for brunch and he says, "So, you're never going to guess what I've been up to." (I can practically hear the grin in his voice). He says, "I've been talking dancing lessons".

Say what?!?!?!

For anyone who knows my dad, he has both talent and interest in many things. Architecture design, woodwork, sailing, leadership, teaching, cooking, skiing..... but dancing has never been something he's ever been into.

I am so very proud of him. He's trying something completely new in his life, with enthusiasm and fun and isn't worried about what other people think.

But, I have to admit...... the thought of my dad scooting across the floor doing the Fox Trot is a GREAT image :-)

Snapshot of Spring

2006-03-02T14:04:00.000-08:00

Spring is here!

This is one of the cherry trees outside my apartment building. I can’t tell you how invigorating it is to walk out the door each morning looking at something so beautifully pink and happy.

Love it. Absolutely love it!

First Camping Trip of 2006

2006-02-27T07:32:00.000-08:00

Phew! What fun..... Erik and I drove out to the coast this weekend for a nice camping trip and the Doo Wop Rally Race. We were a little skeptical about the weather but it turned out really nice..... gray and windy, but not a drop of rain until late Sunday.

One of my favorite things about a road trip out in the middle of nowhere, is the anticipation of seeing something unique and sometimes, really weird. It's like something new and interesting is around every turn.......We saw vintage vehicles, old barns overgrown with blackberries, wildlife (2 herds of wild elk, a bunch of hawks and of course, mule deer). I mean, things like this huge boat project explain it all. I think it was two complete sailboats being fused together to make some sort of huge cruising vessel. How cool is that!?!?

And then there was going to the ocean and making breakfast........

We're celebrating 4 years tomorrow!!!

Then there was the reason we were out there....... fast cars flying around logging roads, miles and miles from any town........

We had such a good time..... very relaxing, lots of great conversation and a nice break from the tv, phones, traffic and of course, a break from work.

My favorite parts:
- Having the tent, with no tent poles!
- Rigging up the most comfortable sleeping arrangment in the truck bed, which will now be used regularly.
- Seeing wild elk running around one of the wildlife preserve
- Cooking breakfast on the beach
- Climbing up part of a mountain to get a fantastic view the of the cars
and
- Being with my one and only :-)

Next camping trip: April 21-23 for the Oregon Trail Rally Race in Hillsboro, OR.

GOING CAMPING (and other thoughts)

2006-02-23T13:10:00.000-08:00

I know, I know, I know....... it's just a tad early for camping :-) BUT! One of our favorite rally races got moved up from May to this weekend, so we're not going to miss it just because of a little rain. The race is in Aberdeen/Brooklyn/Montesano area, which is out on the coast. It's a 2 day event, but Erik and I are only going to the Sunday one. We seem to remember that the stages on Saturday are very limited as far as where we can spectate from. But the stages on Sunday are so fun to watch - they come flying around a corner (This photo was from the same race 2 years ago.....and I wasn't even zoomed it - we can get that close!)

So, we're pretty excited to get out and go on a little road trip. We've both been going stir crazy being cooped up with all the rain and cold weather. We also both got a bunch of new camping gear (including a new GPS thingy!) so we've been looking forward to using it all.

On another subject, can I just get a hell yeah for Sasha Cohen! These photos don't even do her performance justice...... she's been my pick to win gold since the beginning and I think she just might do it!

So, go get 'em Sasha...... gold is yours this time around :-)

And lastly..... I found this quote the other day and wanted to share. I just thought it was so beautiful........

"What you promise today must be renewed and redecided tomorrow and each day that stretches out before you."

- Arthur Gordon

That's it!

Have a fabulous weekend all!

Okay, all 3 of you that read my blog :-)

Where to Begin (now extended yet another week!)

2006-02-13T13:36:00.000-08:00

So many cool things have happened in the last three weeks, I don't even know where to start. My dad returned from Africa safely, we've been working on the new hydroplane, Erik and I took a wild and windy but really fun ferry ride during the winter storm, the company I work for (UBuildIt) awarded another Franchise in Maryland, a friend of mine Mike Taylor got married at the Hollywood School House on Sunday, Erik got asked by his work (BWM Northwest) to speak at a school on the Penisula, my friend Mimi just went into labor this morning and I got my tax refund already! Phew!

I'm going to post a few photos and then I've gotta run - my lunch break is almost up. I've included one of the hydroplanes......

One of the sunrise Erik and I got to watch from a hilltop on South Whidbey......

One of the Mike Taylor / Colleen Cox wedding on Sunday, Feb 12th.......

It's now February 20th - I saved this as a draft last week and was not able to finish it until today. Man, how times flies!

So, the newest news is that my dad is leaving (again) for California for a week to be with my mom's parents, which will be fun for him. Um, Erik and I had to change our flights for Mexico (damn Delta Airlines - NEVER fly with them), so now we're getting into Cabo at noon instead of 9pm, which gives us a half day to play in the sun! Hmmmm..... I think that's about it. Oh! Except that I'm just SO excited for the Olympics and the Ladie's Ice Skating that's taking place this week. Sasha Cohen is my pick for gold....she rocks :-)

Anyways, lunchtime is over - gotta run to a meeting!

Thank God for Girlfriends

2006-02-01T21:55:00.000-08:00

I will say it again. Thank God for girlfriends.

Here's how it all started.........I stopped by the gym after a challenging day at work to take it all out on the treadmill.....which I did. I did my warm up, then ran so hard I could barely see afterwards. But it felt wonderful. I gathered my things and made my way out to my car. As I was walking, I realized I was favoring one of my legs because my calf and tendon were so sore. And then it came in a huge rush...... you know when you have a sudden memory, that only takes just a split second to remember and you can feel whatever it was that you were feeling back in that moment?

I suffered from awful charlie horses in my calves during swim meets and my mom used to massage my calves and Achilles tendons in between heats to help make 'em go away. She did this for years. I instantly started crying and felt so sad........ she was my biggest fan. Always there to cheer me on, even if I was 4 lenghts behind, she would cheer for me like I was going to win. At the time I thought it was embarressing - now I feel grateful and I would give anything to have my mom standing next to the treadmill with a stop watch and a wistle, wearing her classic spandex bike shorts and cute little Polo top that showed off her trim figure, loudly encouraging me to keep going and push myself a little further.

I cried all the way home and when I got into my parking lot, I had to talk to someone. I called Shannon and within 10 secs, she invited me over to talk. When I got there, she had the candles lit on the mantle and a pot of hot water boiling for hot chocolate. I sank into her ultra-comfy, creamy leather couch and just let it all out. And she just listened......nodding her head and handing me tissue. I gushed and gushed about it all and when I was done, I felt so relieved. We spent the rest of the evening gabbing about this and that, sharing what's going on in our lives..... true girl talk. Oh, and then we had a good laugh watching people makes absolute fools of themselves trying out for American Idol while eating ice cream bars.

Thank goodness for strong, sensitive, compassionate women like Shannon........ she knew exactly what I needed. Candles, hot chocolate, a couch to sink into, a box of tissues and her undivided attention.

SUPER BOWL XL - HERE WE COME!

2006-01-23T08:34:00.000-08:00

Phew! How fun is this??!?!?!? The Hawks have finally arrived! NFC Champions, baby!

We crushed the Panthers 34-14.......... what a great game. Hasselbeck stepped up, Jeremy Stevens got it all started, Trufant was excellent and Shaun Alexander, as always, gave us a great running game.

The Steelers are in for a ride because the Hawks are comin' to win........... :-)

Finally......

OUCH! Poor Delhomme.......

Another Overseas Trip for my Dad

2006-01-19T08:35:00.000-08:00

My dad is in South Africa! How cool is that?!?!

He's there with my uncle Stan, helping out with designing and building cabins/structures for an organization opening a camp down there. He's in Capetown, I believe and will be there for 3 weeks. I'm so excited that he's traveling and seeing the world. I miss him already but I know that God will keep them all safe, healthy and energized as they serve Him......

I'll post some pictures when he gets back - I have a feeling they'll be pretty cool. While they're there, some locals will take 'em on a safari to check out the landscape and wildlife (which is a life-long DREAM of mine)........ and my dad has a great camera, so I'm sure he'll get some fantastic images.

Anyways, say a little prayer for health and safetly in an unfamiliar place w/ unfamiliar people, laws and customs.

I guess that's it for now.......

Oh, GO SEAHAWKS! They're going all the way this year and we all know.......Carolina is going down on Sunday, big time. I'm predicting a low scoring game due to the excellent defenses on both sides and hopefully Hassellbeck won't have to scramble so much this weekend :-)

A Sliver of Sun

2006-01-11T22:03:00.000-08:00

After 24 straight days of rain, you can imagine my surprise and pure delight when I glanced up and saw sunshine making shadows on the blinds! I immediately stepped outside, faced the sun and smiled, thanking God for this little break.

Even though it lasted all of oh, maybe 60 seconds........ it was enough to remind me that spring is coming and the gray will soon be gone.

It was refreshing :-)

And I am so thankful for it.

2006, Here I come!

2006-01-05T17:47:00.000-08:00

2006 is going to be a great year.

I can feel it. It's like how you can feel when a big storm is going to come - ya just feel it :-)

My goals this year are simple, but still not easy. Getting my credit cleaned up, having a savings account balance that I don't touch until 2007 and losing at least 25lbs are my goals. All possible - all require lots of dedication - but I know it's within my reach.

And the things that are planned for this year are SO fun, I can hardly wait :-) Erik and I are celebrating 4 years in February, April brings the start of rally racing season, we all get to travel down to Mexico for my bro's wedding on May 25th, May also brings the start of hydro racing season (meaning even more camping!), which will last the whole summer. I'm so stoked :-) There's something about going on road trips that brings me so much joy...... being away from all the pavement and stoplights and phone calls - it's truly my mini-escape from all the maddness. I think my favorite part is the trees. Even though I live in an area that has plenty of trees, being out in a national forest full of enormous trees is so cool to me. Makes me feel small.......in a good way.

Anyways!! I'm excited about the upcoming year..... I believe it will hold really awesome things for me, for my family, for UBuildIt and for my friends (some of whom are having babies!!! - Congratulations guys!).

Considering my 2005, I think I can take anything that comes my way, no matter what year it turns.

PHEW!

2005-12-28T15:45:00.000-08:00

I hope anyone who's reading had a wonderful Christmas, just like I did :-)

It was a whirlwind of activity...... Erik and I joined my family at my dad's on Saturday morning for brunch. We had a really nice time..... Mary brought this wonderful egg souffle, my dad baked a ham and I did the fruit salad. It definitely felt nice to have my family around me - I'm also grateful to spend a little time with my bro Tim. I don't get to see him very often, so even the short 20 mins was nice. We opened presents, watched the Seahawks beat the Colts and ate way too much cheesecake! And Calvin (my nephew) got this cool ninja play set that he couldn't get enough of. It was a KICK watching him run around the living room like we were under seige!

Then later that afternoon, my dad, Erik and I hopped on the freeway towards Bellingham to see my dad's family. We stopped by the hospital to see my grandpa.... he hasn't been feeling well the last few days, so they're keeping him there to keep him comfortable. It was great to still see a nice smile on his face and hear him cracking jokes :-) Dinner with my aunt and uncle Gillespie was wonderful! Stan is always full of stories from his travels as a missionary. I swear there are few countries he has yet to see. It was getting late so we headed out after dessert. Erik and I still had some things planned....

We had left my car in Everett to make it easy to travel to Whidbey Christmas Eve..... we made the 11pm ferry and looked for his parent's but we didn't seem 'em. Turns out, they were on the ferry and we all arrived at the same time. There was some last minute present wrapping, but all of us headed to bed not to long after arriving, I think we were all pretty much beat :-) Erik and I got to sleep out in the living room by the tree and I gotta tell ya, it was kinda fun to fall asleep smelling that fresh tree smell while it was storming outside. Anyways!! Christmas morning with the Hadlock's is always fun...... it's laid back and full of smiles, breakfast and surprises. Judy got a new dishwasher, Kenda got a new cell phone, Erik got a nice propane camping stove. Erik and his grandparent's also went in on a huge gift for his dad. He's been so excited to fix up the hydroplane, so they decided he could do a better job with air-compression tools. So....... they bought him a nice, vertical air compressor! But it was at Donna and Harry's, so he only got clues on Christmas morning.... he had to wait until later that afternoon to find out and it was AWESOME watching him try to figure it out. In the end, the wait was worth it and I think he really loved it. Phew! So we had a great lunch with Donna and Harry.... their present to me was almost overwhelming - they're going to take Erik and I out on the town for a ballet performanc at Mccaw Hall! We're stoked to go and Erik even gets to drive their new Mercedes.... I felt very grateful and I'm looking forward to a classy night out :-)

FROM THERE, we went to Grandma Glo's for dinner! By this time we've had 3 full, holiday meals and were stuffed. But of course we made some room for Glo's yummy roast and mashed potatos. We hung out there for the rest of the evening, drinking wine and opening presents. Oh yeah, and got wrapped up in this frustratingly difficult puzzel.

Erik and I then headed home to veg out and watch Chevy Chase in Christmas Vacation, possibly the best Christmas movie ever made :-)

Christmas went by in a whirlwind of fun......and I am so glad that I can look back on my first Christmas without my mom and remember a happy time. I thought of her often whileI was watching other people hug their mom's and cook with their moms.... and I got a really sad and wished she was here to share in all the fun.......but I was also truly happy to be with the people I love and so grateful to be welcomed with open arms by Erik's extended family, just like every year :-)

And I know my mama was watching us party and spend time laughing with each other. I know that's all she wanted, was her family to be together and to be happy. And we were. (And just imagine what kind of party was going on in Heaven....she was having a wonderful time).

Here are some photos from our fun......

Oh The Holidays

2005-12-20T19:28:00.000-08:00

For the all wonderful, loving, warm and fun things about the holidays, there are justmany annoying and not fun things about the holidays. Allow me to share :=)

Warm and fuzzy things:
- Pipping hot cider and a gingerbread cookies
- Receiving a Christmas card from a friend in your mailbox instead of your inbox
- Twinkling lights everywhere you look
- Knowing that you're celebrating the birth of God, how cool is that?
- Little kids running around trying to be good for Santa
- Mountains of wrapping paper, tissue paper, ribbons and tape
- Gathering around a fire with your family, chatting and sipping coffee
- Making a wish list
- Knowing you just bought a thoughful gift that special person will LOVE.

Irritating and not-so-fun things:
- Price stickers on paperback books
- Receipts that are as long as the Declaration of Independence
- Stores that have 18 checkout stations and only have 7 open
- All the seasonal customer service people that don't give a crap
- The holiday sweaters that should have been thrown out back in 1984
- That goes for the holiday pins too
- Knowing that when all is said and done, I'll be broke until March....and lastly,
- That kid in the department store that screams, "But I waaaaaaaaaaaaant it now, mommy!!!!!"

There. I feel better :-)

I really am enjoying the holidays..... plans are working out, I'm easily finding gifts for everyone and I'm meeting some relatives that I've never met before. I miss having my mom to go shopping with and to help me wrap (because I'm probably the worst wrapper ever - I'll have to be extra careful this year not to rip the paper before I even get it wrapped!). But I know she's looking down, giggling at my awful warpping and loving me from afar.

I'm Officially Welcoming Winter

2005-12-12T22:30:00.000-08:00

I now have a Christmas tree and just finished digging out fun decorations - I am officially in the holiday mood :-) Families are making plans, I have to wear a scarf when I go outside, I'm researching Stuffed Mushroom recipes, my car takes forever to warm up...... but I'm enjoying all of it.

I am looking forward to everyone meeting at my parent's place, all under one roof. I know Christmas may be a little different this year..... we'll be missing mom every moment. But I know that she'd want all of us sit around and catch up in the living room - with the fire going and coffee in our hands, watching Calvin run around and try to guess what each present is, probably getting at least half of 'em right :-)

And to top it all off, Erik and I are going to go play in the snow this weekend for my birthday! We were planning on going snowshoeing but with this hacking cough, I'm not sure I could last very long. I am looking forward to tossing a couple snowballs at him though.....

Merry Christmas everyone!
And if you celebrate something other than Christmas, Merry (_________) to you!

Now Do Ya Believe?

2005-12-06T18:09:00.000-08:00

Monday Night Football is where it's at..... if you're a Seahawks fan anyways.....they're a different team this year and regardless of Superbowl or not, it's been a fantastic season.

42 to ZERO - Woohoo!

I know we didn't play a perfect game and I know the Eagles could have played MUCH better. But, the Hawks now have players that can step up and make the big plays, when before they would fumble or drop or get a penalty. Go Dyson!

I'm willing to put some money on the playoffs, anyone wanna take me up? (uh, but I'm not rich, so how's 10 bucks sound?)

:=)

(now if we can just make the big plays and not turn the ball over to the Colts, we'll be just fine)

Quickie Post

2005-12-04T18:40:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is December 5th already?!?!?! So many things going on in the next 30 days is crazy (even the spring/summer is already getting scheduled out).

Happy Birthday to my brother Jeff!!! Your birthday and the Seahawks on Monday Night Football......it doesn't get much better than that.

Alrighty, so I have a day off on Friday the 9th to do some Christmas shopping and Erik and I are also going to my brother's theater performance at Northshore Baptist that evening - On Saturday the 10th we're going to BMW's semi-formal Christmas party - On Sunday the 11th we're headed to Erik's parent's place to select a Christmas tree - On Saturday the 17th Erik and I are going snoeshoeing up at the pass for my birthday - Monday the 25th is Christmas - I have that whole week off - then New Years - then our 4 year anniversary is on February 28th - then we're going to Cabo San Lucas for my bro's wedding May 25th - and sometime right before that starts the Hydroplane season (and the Rally Racin' season too!) - Not to mention all the other holidays and birthdays inbetween - and that takes us through the summer and into fall - then we do it all over again! Craziness I tell ya! I shouldn't recap the upcoming events like that.....makes life seem way too short. But, at least is a fun-filled, action packed time, right?

I hope everyone is enjoying the cheesy Christmas music, inceasant shopping comercials, the bitter cold nights and all the Egg Nog and shortbread cookies you can handle, just like I am :-)

Oh! And my dad made it safely back from Vietnam - I haven't spoken to him yet so I don't have any details - I just got a voicemail from. So, I'm glad he's home safe and sound..... I missed him very much.

Laundry to do! Adios!

Thanksgiving Fun

2005-11-30T13:24:00.000-08:00

Mashed potatos, green bean cassarole, football, good company, 7 Dwarf trophies, napping and pie..... all part of my Thanksgiving. Since my dad is overseas right now and Jeff and Mary went down to Oregon, I went to Erik's parents for the day - it was a blast :-) The food was excellent and we had such a good time chatting and watching the games..... I'm thankful to have Erik's family, as well as my own family.

Here are some pictures from football and napping. Football was SO fun! I've never played w/ 8 year olds and 30 year olds in the same game..... I made one great catch too! Anyways - loads of fun.

Enjoy!

2005-11-16T11:31:00.000-08:00

Hopeless romantics are only hopeless in the eyes of those who don't believe in romance.

~Jean Zheng~

I can't help it..... every day I seem to fall in love with him all over again. I could go on and on about the things that I love about him and our relationship. But, I have to point out one thing........laughter. Erik can draw the most genuine, belly laugh from me like no one else! There are times I laugh so hard I cry..... I have doubled over in tummy pain and I have peed my pants......all because of my wondeful partner in crime :-)

And even though we're always changing, both as a couple and as individuals, it's so great knowing that we can depend on each other. Contentment..... what a wonderful place to be in.

My Dad's Trip Overseas

2005-11-11T13:36:00.000-08:00

My dad (Ed) is joining up with some family friends (David and Larelle Catherman) and traveling to Vietnam for a couple weeks. They are involved with a company called Medrix.

Every 3 seconds, one child dies from the lack of safe drinking water (Source: Unicef/WHO Water for Life, Making it Happen 2005).

In 2004, 2.2 million deaths worldwide were attributed to unsafe drinking water; nine out of those ten were children under 5 years of age (Source: Wateraid, 2005).

1.1 billion people (about 20% of the world's population lack access to safe drinking water.

And Medrix has come up with a wonderful solution!

Using UV technology, they have devised a water-treament system that is safe, affordable and teachable in foreign countries. Right now, Medrix being tested in Vietnam and that is where my dad and their team are traveling to.

Please pray for safe travel for all...... please pray for good communication and relations with the local Vietamese people. And also, please pray that no one comes into contact w/ the poultry :-)

Thank you all and please do visit the website for Medrix! I found it quite interesting.....

2005-11-09T12:59:00.000-08:00

My dear friend Carly wrote on her blog about how she was walking down the street and saw Jon from Switchfoot and interrupted a conversation he was having before she even realized he was having one :-) Poor thing...... It's funny how we all turn to blubbering dummies when we come face to face w/ a celebrity we adore. That reminded me of a time I made a complete fool of myself...... (Surprised anyone? I Didn't think so).

I was working at the front desk of the Bellevue Club and some man asked me for a locker key. I asked him name and looked up at him at the same time.

He said, "um... Gates".

And I said, "First name?".

The very ordinary looking, polite and unassuming man then said, "Bill."

I stared at him a moment and then it dawned on me.

I was speaking to single richest man in the world - and I didn't recognize him. His face has been over nearly every magazine and has been plaster in the news more than Brittany Spears and I still didn't recognize him right away. I remember gathering my composure, not fall over apologizing and just give him the locker key and told him to have a wonderful evening.

I'm just glad no one was there to witness my utter cluelessness :-)

A Little Reminder

2005-11-07T22:48:00.000-08:00

It had been a long time since I had spoken to my Grandma Antisdale, my mom's mom. I love her dearly and think about her and my grandpa often, but something always seems to comes up and get in the way of calling them.

Well, one night I just couldn't wait any longer. I was aching to call her and I'm soooooo glad I did..... we had the heart to heart talk I've been wanting to have with her. She was so soft and so encouraging and so patient. Now, my grandma has always been wonderful and sweet and kind..... but there's nothing like talking to your grandma who lost the daughter that was your mother.

While I was in the middle of apologizing for not calling as often as I would like, she told me something that has given me such peace. She said, "Well dear, you know we still pray for you every night, right?".

That means that for all this time, they've been remembering me each night......

And that feels great :-) Thanks Grandma and Grandpa A.

Nostalgia

2005-11-01T12:29:00.000-08:00

Been thinking about my mom a bunch this morning........Maybe it's the hustle and bustle of the holidays. I keep getting these little bits of memories popping into my head. Like the time my dad gave her a used toaster from Shop 'n Save as a gag gift back in the mid 90's. She laughed and laughed and laughed and thought it was sooooo clever :-) I think we still have a few pics of that - I'll post 'em if I can find 'em.

Or the time she made the best turkey gravy you had ever seen or smelled in your life. Oooooo that stuff was good. It was creamy and salty and perfect. But of course, me being the clutz that I am, I dumped the whole gravy boat over on the dining room carpet while carrying it to the table. And instead of being upset, she giggled and said something like, "Well, at least it matches the color of the carpet!" What a mom, huh?

One Christmas, she and I were getting ready for the Overlake Christmas Tree performance. I had just spilled chocolate on my red, crushed velvet dress with about 5 mins until we needed to leave. We tried baking soda. We tried cold water. We tried Shout - nothing worked. Then, she let out a big sigh and said, "Come with me". We walked upstairs to her closet and she pulled out the most delicate and sophisticated black peacoat and wanted me to wear it. I had just spilled chocolate on myself and now she wanted me to wear her expensive clothes???? I'll never forget that. I felt like I was all grown up (and I was like, 9). She made me feel so pretty that day.

I know that the holidays this year will be different. It's going to be sad and maybe a little awkward, but I know she'll be watching us connect with each other and spend valuable time together. Christmas will be one of the few days where our whole family is under one roof this year and I know that's all she wanted..... for her family to love each other.

And we do.

I found a photo of her last year at Thanksgiving. Isn't she beautiful?

WHAT?!?!

2005-10-25T17:22:00.000-07:00

So here I am, enjoying my 12-inch, Spicy Italian on Italian Herb and Cheese bread from my local Subway. It has all my favorite pepperchinis, tomatos, lots of mustard and provalone cheese. Wait, provalone isn't my favorite. Why, you ask, do I have my least favorite cheese on my sandwich?

Because my local Subway store phased out cheddar cheese.

I burst out laughing when the girl told me..... she looked at me sypathetically and said, "I know, crazy huh? They didn't do it for all stores, just the ones in this area" (she also mentioned something about King County). So, I asked her who I would need to contact to expres my surprise and dissatisfaction. She told to me call the number on the bag which is:

(800) 888-4848

Cheese lovers, help me out here!!! A sandwhich isn't a sandwhich without your favorite cheese on it!!! Maybe we can get them to put cheddar cheese back on their delicious sandwiches.

Thanks to all who care about the little things in life...............

Like cheese.

:=)

A Night Out on the Town

2005-10-20T17:31:00.000-07:00

Today happens to be my late mother's birthday...... I felt like doing something special so Erik and I are headed out to one of her favorite restaurants, Palisade. We get to go out to a fancy place, eat fantastic food and have a toast to the woman who made an unforgettable impression on the world......and on me.

It feels right to me......probably because I know that it's what she would have done......

In the coming years, something like this may not feel as important to me. Or maybe it will. I have no idea. What I do know is that I'm looking forward to sharing childhood memories with the man I love , over steak and champagne :-)

I just thank God every day for the unconditional love He sends my way. I am truly blessed.

52 Things I Want To Do In My Lifetime

2005-10-18T15:47:00.000-07:00

I was recently challenged to make a list, however long I wanted, of the top things I wanted to do or acheive in my lifetime. Of course there are many more things I'll want to do in my lifetime, but here are 52 of 'em, in no particular order :=)

1) Travel to Australia
2) Work with children diagnosed with cancer
3) Read one book off of Oprah’s List
4) Learn to play guitar
5) Be a summer camp counselor again
6) Honor my mom’s legacy by helping to keep the whole family connected
7) Obtain a college degree that I will actually use
8) See the Great White Sharks feeding off the tip of South Africa
9) Do some research and form my own opinion about the JFK assassination
10) Design and build my own home (probably using the UBuildIt program!)
11) Participate in a cancer walk
12) Get back into horseback riding
13) Travel to Kenya, Ireland, Jamaica, Brazil, the Canadian Yukon and Russia (among many other places)
14) Get with the times and actually buy a music apparatus (i.e. iPod or mp3 player)
15) Start a once-a-month massage regimen
16) Overcome my phobia of roller coasters
17) Send one month traveling and taking photos of God’s gorgeous, natural earth
18) Climb a mountain…….any mountain
19) Learn how to play the bass clef on the piano
20) Meet my birthmom, Brenda
21) Be the best wife and mother that I can be, just like my mom was
22) Purchase (or build) a vacation cabin somewhere, preferably near a beach or in the mountains
23) Record my own song someday, just for fun
24) Have an outdoor wedding
25) Master the art of cooking non-predictable dishes (like Spaghetti, Omelets, etc)
26) Take another Sign Language class (and actually try to learn it this time!)
27) Own matching bath towels (and maybe matching dish sets too)
28) Get over my fear and try to ski again….. and not on the bunny hill
29) To challenge myself at public speaking and get over my stage fright
30) Write less predictable poetry
31) Have a dark room in my home
32) Start a journal and actually keep it up to date
33) Regularly give money to the church and to one medical research organization
34) Visit the Statue of Liberty
35) Spend one New Year’s Eve in an exotic location (Spain anyone?)
36) Learn to ice skate
37) Watch a launch of a space shuttle
38) Ride a mechanical bull
39) See the Goonie’s movie
40) Test drive a REALL nice car…..
41) Take my kids to Disney World
42) Visit a tropical rainforest
43) See a Broadway show in New York
44) Learn to knit
45) Experience zero gravity
46) Kiss in Paris
47) Swim with a dolphin
48) Have my portrait painted or drawn
49) Go to Walden Pond and read Thoreau while drifting in a canoe
50) Take private voice lessons again
51) Take my own road trip, all the way around the US
52) Create the Hawkinson/Antisdale most up-to-date family tree

Amazing Photography

2005-10-12T12:53:00.000-07:00

I found this incredible site http://mig81.com/highland/index-e.htm - I found a whole bunch of incredible photos.....

Here's just a couple of 'em....

In the past year, I have had this growing obsession with nature photograhpy. I can spend hours searching online for photos like the ones above. Photos that make me ponder.....like what in the world that bridge was/is used for and why is it so long and why does it disappear into the water?

I wish I could just travel the world and take pictures of gorgeous things.....things I can't see from my little porch in Kirkland, WA :=)

Hopefully one day I'll be able to.

2005-10-03T12:37:00.000-07:00

I miss my mom today......

It's amazing to me that it's been just over 6 months since she went to meet the Lord..... Sometimes it feels like 10 mins ago and I can still hear her voice comforting me - and other times it feels like 10 years ago and my memories are slipping.

It's amazing to me how differently I feel now. I was so angry and confused, trying to find answers and ways to understand why. I have accepted that I will probably never know why she had to go so soon and even though that irks me beyond beliefe, it's almost comforting knowing that I can stop searching for answers and just accept it.

It's amazing to me the instant empathy I feel towards people going through losing a loved one. A co-worker of mine is in the "waiting" stage of saying goodbye to his mother..... I hope my eyes conveyed how deeply I felt for what he's going through. The waiting is the worst, by far.

It's amazing to me that even though I am so deeply hurt from losing my mom, I can still feel so much love and hope for the people still in my life. I thank God each day for my family, my friends and my partner Erik..... without the people in my life I think I'd lose it each day.

It's just amazing.

Erik Racin'!

2005-09-29T12:30:00.000-07:00

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Look at him go! Erik's dad, Jeff, let him race the first heat of the last event of the season..... It was a gorgeous, sunny day at Moses Lake and even though we had gone through one problem after another (trailer wheels flying off, an expensive tow-truck ride, half of Moses lake being out of power, driving around to 5+ places not being able to find the right wheel bearings, buying a grinder to make it work, getting the boat into the water with 3 mins to spare.....need I go on?) we had a blast...... the most disappointing thing had to be the engine giving out on the last half of the last lap :-( After further investigation, it was determined that the boat was done for the year. I know we were all disappointed that Jeff didn't get to drive it one last time. All the more reason to get the engine in tippy-top shape for next season, right?!

Also, I didn't anticipate my adrenaline rush from watching Erik drive the boat - I was shaking trying to take pictures! I couldn't even imagine what the driver goes though! It was exciting, nerve-wracking and a very proud moment for everyone :-) Anyways, the racing season is over but overall, it's been such a blast. Jeff and Erik worked very hard on the boat this year, making it run like a champ! I can't wait for next season!

Thanks Jeff and Judy for such a fun time during hydro races and for letting me be so involved! I can't wait to see what's in store for Powerful Ju Ju next year.........

:=)

2005-09-21T13:00:00.000-07:00

Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.

- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Look at 'em. They have the same smile, the same posture and the same look of contentment on their faces..... it was a beautiful wedding and I'm sure it was just the start of a beautiful, fullfilling marriage.

Allison (Erik's cousin) looked stunning all night and the party afterwards was a blast! Dancing, great food, open free bar, a full moon....... how perfect.

Cabo San Lucas Trip!

2005-09-16T15:44:00.001-07:00

I know, I know, I know......it's been a couple weeks since I've been back from my trip..... life is just gets so crazy trying to juggle all the important stuff together and keep my sanity. But, I have a few mins now and wanted to post some pictures up today. You can view all of them here on my photo album blog.

We had a fabulous time......... the weather was hot and really humid, but being in constant sunshine was very rejuvinating for all of us. We sat in the pool reading our new books and sipping Pina Colada after Martini after Cosmo after Daquiri..... :-) There was the coolest swim-up bar right in the pool! We could order anything we wanted and have it served to us in the pool. SO fun!

The beach was incredible! It had been a long time since I've smelled salt water. I mean, I've been crusing around in the Puget Sound lately, but not the ocean...... it was glorious. Unfortunately we couldn't swim in the surf right at the resort, the rip-tipe was way too strong. We had the gorgeous pools for that - one even had built-in lounge things right in the shallow end!

We went snorkling (which was so gorgeous!) and went out to eat at cool restaurants and went for a drive looking at the sights. The resort we stayed at was called the Playa Grande and it was beyond anything I had even stayed at before. Marble and granite everything....complete with hand-done stone work and the coolest artwork ever. The room we stayed in was fantistic and comfortable with the most incredible view of the ocean. Ahhhhh..... I wish I was back there :-)

I needed this vacation, more so than I realized....... I feel refreshed. I feel like I'm ready to tackle the next goal. I feel enlightened and peaceful and confident. Of course those are just feelings...... those can change daily. I missed my mom terribly on the trip, especially because I know it was the place my parents last took a vacation together. I did catch my dad staring off into the vast, never-ending ocean and remembering the good times. My dad, Jeff and I spent out time hanging out together and bonding....... I'm so grateful for the time we all got together. Thanks for the trip Daddy!!!

Oh and the last thing! I got a massage right on the beach, next to the rolling waves..... it was soooooooooooooooo incredible.......... I could barely move a finger afterwards. Between the eucalyptus scented oil, the waves crashing every few seconds, the warm breeze mozying on by and the skills of my massage therapist - I was sent into pure relaxation......

Well, I need to sign off - I'm still at work and need to finish up a few things before the week is done! Erik and I are headed out on the road straight after work to Ellensburg for his cousin's wedding! STOKED! Should be a good, mini roap trip :-)

Remember to check out the pics!

Finally.........a Real Vacation

2005-08-26T14:22:00.000-07:00

My dad is wonderful....... :-)

He's taking my brother, Jeff and I on vacation to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. We leave early tomorrow morning and by early, I mean early. We have to be at the airport by 4:30 in the morning.... icky. But of course it's worth it to be on our way to sunny beaches and fruity drinks!

It's going to be nice to spend some alone time with my fam....... it'll be a time to reflect, a time to laugh together and a time to look forward as a family and talk about the things to come.

And of course it'll be a time of surfing, exploring, lounging and drinkin, too! I plan to take a bunch of pictures and post them on my new photo album blog.

I'll be back on Saturday, Sept 3rd - see you then!

Oh, and Happy Early Birthday, baby! I know I'll be gone on your bday but I'll call ya :-)

27.....can you you believe it?!?! Hehehehehe...........I Love you!

Hmmmmmm

2005-08-24T08:15:00.000-07:00

Even though I know this picture is fake, it facinated me......

Maybe it's because there's a relection for something that isn't possible.....

Maybe it's because it's reminds me that the impossible is tempting.....

Or maybe it's because I'm easily ammused :-)

For whatever reason, I like it.

Summer Day at Whidbey

2005-08-20T22:37:00.000-07:00

Erik and his dad painted the hydroplane today and it looks prett slick! I'll post pictures tomorrow when I can find good batteries. The boat is all white and now has a bright yet really rich red strip from the front, down the sponson and straight out the back. There's still a lot of work to do on the boat before they race it out in Ione in a couple weeks, but today, it was all about shiny paint :-)

And then there was the Island County Fair........There are so many colorful, interesting and slighty crazy people in the Northwest...... It was my first time at the fair and I had a blast :-) Erik and I saw the most amazing, enormous birds as we were walking in. Some wildlife organization was walking by with a hawk and a bald eagle. I never thought an eagle could get so huge..... it was so beautiful. Definitely a cool moment (and of course my camera batteries had died).

We then sat and ate good, greasy fair food, people watching and listening to some live band named Foghat. Decent music, but we did leave soon after that.

Erik and I spent the rest of the evening driving around Whidbey and then took a long stroll down a beach while the tide was coming in.

What a day........ what a perfect day.

New Fav Website

2005-08-12T07:36:00.000-07:00

http://www.answers.com/

Check it out! Type in any word and it gives you dictionary definition, thesaurus, encyclopedia, language translations and much more. There's downloads, shopping, news headlines and archive, calendar and it goes on.

It's a cooler, more funky approach powered by Google.

:=)

New Photo Album Blog

2005-08-11T08:59:00.000-07:00

I have a new blog site that I will be posting most of my photos on!

Visit http://amyspicturecollection.blogspot.com/ to check it out! More coming later - have to get 'em all organized and stuff.

:=)

Giggle Giggle

2005-08-10T10:06:00.000-07:00

We're such dorks.....

It was a late night, we missed a ferry and had to wait another hour or so - we got bored and started taking goofy pictures.

I love being able to act like a complete bafoon.....

(especially with another bafoon)

:=)

MY BRO'S ENGAGED!

2005-08-03T21:30:00.000-07:00

That gorgeous woman you see there is Mary..... a one-of-a-kind woman who stole my brother's heart :-) I am SO excited for him!!!! Jeff's picky and it takes a special female that can put up with him. And Mary is just wonderful....... she has felt like part of the family since we all first met. We were all wondering, "Sheesh, when's Jeff going to propose to her???"
He was so romantic about it too..... they were vacationing in Napa Valley, CA and he proposed to her in a beautiful garden next to a vinyard.

The only downside it that they're thinking about having a destination wedding......ya know, like Hawaii or Jamaica or the Carribean...... so that means $$$. Of course it's their wedding and it's important they do something that is meaningful to them..... but I know some of our extended family would like to attend and couldn't if it meant getting on a plane. So, we'll see. I'm just happy it's finally happened!!!

Congratulations, guys!

:-)

2005-07-28T09:41:00.000-07:00

My mom showed up in my dream last night……..wearing her classic red and white blouse under a navy-blue suit……..her hair like usual, simple and sophisticated……..her smile warm and confident……..she stood there looking at me just for a moment, then she was gone.

I miss her so much and I am so grateful that I get glimpses of her in my dreams. I miss her guidance, her gentleness, her wisdom…… and her hugs.

Cherish your mothers, no matter how nosy or controlling or messy or weird or unfair they seem….. you’ll never get another one.

All men and women are born, live suffer and die; what distinguishes us one from another is our dreams, whether they be dreams about worldly or unworldly things, and what we do to make them come about... We do not choose to be born. We do not choose our parents. We do not choose our historical epoch, the country of our birth, or the immediate circumstances of our upbringing. We do not, most of us, choose to die; nor do we choose the time and conditions of our death. But within this realm of choicelessness, we do choose how we live.

- Joseph Epstein

Time?

2005-07-21T22:05:00.000-07:00

How is it that life can hit the fast-forward button whenever it pleases and you never can win the battle to slow it down?

To anyone in my life I have not returned a call to, I'm so sorry! I think of you often and if I wasn't buried up to my eyeballs in stuff, things would be different.

Life won't always move this fast, will it?

Anyways, quicky update!

- My new position is great! Challenging and it's stretching me mentally, but I'm enjoying myself.
- Erik has fulfilled his agreement with BMW of North America and has been at BMW Northwest for 6 months now :-) YAH!
- A good friend, Mimi, told me recently that she's having a baby! CONGRATS!!!!
- I'm going to Mexico in 4 weeks and I'm stoked! (I even bought a new tankini!)
- Jen just started the 2nd part of her extern assisting in general surgery at a huge, busy hospital in Spokane..... how fun!

Time for bed...... lots of stuff to do tomorrow...... more about my weekend camping and hydroplane pictures to come this weekend!

Unusual Shout Out

2005-07-01T20:33:00.000-07:00

Miriam Ruth Badgett.

If you're out there, call me! I lost your number and your wedding is next month...... I've searched high and low and can't locate it anywhere and I really want to see you get married!

I'm still at the number you called me at earlier this year, or if you can't remember that, call my dad (since I know you remembered their # even after all this time) :-)

Hopefully my plea will work and she'll wake up one morning and say to herself, "I think I'll Google my name today and see what shows up."

:-)

Anyways, I'm off to bed. Erik and I area leaving before the sun comes up for a camping trip :) Erik's dad is racing his hydroplane in Newport, WA this weekend and we're making a road trip out of it. VERY excited to see him race with the new motor...... plus it's supposed to be nice and toasty in Eastern Washington this weekend :-)

Bubye!

Roots and Wings

2005-06-19T19:24:00.000-07:00

It has been said that there are two lasting gifts a parents can give a child. One is roots and the other wings. My roots are in a house at the bottom of a hill, nestled deep in a beautifl cul-de-sac in Bellevue. Family card games echo down the halls. Sights of my parents sitting on the love seat, sharing a glass of wine at the end of the day replay over and over in my mind. The smell of mom's spaghetti or seafood gumbo floating through the downstairs. As I stared at the piano basking in the sunlight let in from the new french doors, I could almost see her bony, elegant fingers pressing the keys, playing ballads from broadway musicals.

She is in the walls, in the mirrors, around the yard and in the kitchen. Yet, there is another presence I feel too......that of my dads. Even though it was my mom who did most of the raising, dad was always there to back her up or to help her in some way. She was the noise - he was the
"ummmph". She came to the soccer games and swim meets and horseshows..... he worked hard so that her and I could enjoy those things together (and of course he came out when he could, too!).

Before I was in junior high, my dad worked long hours to provide for his family. My mom felt very strongly about my dad coming home to a hot meal and a clean home. It was her way of showing him she was grateful. It was a rule that the dinner table had to be set by the time he got home.....and this was delegated to me. She also had to have a spotless kitchen when she cooked and that was my job too. For years, I fought her tooth and nail, saying, "Why do I need to clean it all up if you're just going to dirty it all up again?". She wouldn't give me a straight answer and always said to do it because she asked me to.

I understand it now. She didn't want things perfect for my dad because she HAD to. She WANTED to. She loved him so much, that she was willing to go the extra mile every single day just to show him so. She wasn't oppressed or forced or obligated...... she was in love. And now that I am too, I understand what it means to give on one's self every day. She took care of him and he took care of us all. And even though she was the one I remember most in my childhood, I have always had a peace about my dad...... they came as a twosome, a couple, one being. Where one was, you could find the other. Growing up with that gave me an iron-clad faith in love and an undying committment to have that in my own life.

My adoration and repsect for my father has grown so much in the past 3 months....... He is the most intimate link I have with my mom. And because of the fact that God made them one spirit and one being the day they took their vows, I can feel her when I'm with my dad......

And that........gives me wings.

2005-06-14T17:57:00.000-07:00

You know what I hate?

People who take their precious time when the left turn light turns green. We all know that they only stay green for all of 4 seconds, let's get a move on people! I've got places to go and things to do......... don't you????? We're all going somewhere. Work.....home.....soccer games.....grocery stores.....second jobs.....airline flights.....doctors appts.......ferries and friend's houses. And judging by the way most people drive, we'll all in a hurry.

I've been the 3rd car in line and there are times I don't make it because someone is lagging along. My commute to work is 1.3 miles and it can take me upwards of 20 mins just because of slow people in left turn lanes. Erik drives 40 miles to work and it takes him about 45 mins at the same time of day. There's something wrong with that, dontcha think? :-)

So, to all those people out there that only accelerate to 5 MPH while making a left hand turn......step on it! It'll make everyone on the road just a smidge happier.

(my overbooked, inside-out, twisty-turvey, upside-down and everything inbetween day has made me a little on edge. Tomorrow is a new day and tomorrow will be a much better one)

I want to.......

2005-06-13T13:55:00.000-07:00

Live with intention

Walk to the edge

Listen hard

Practice wellness

Play with abandon

L a u g h

Choose with no regret

Continue to Learn

Appreciate your friends

Do what you love

Live as if this is all there is

Mary Anne M.B.L. Radmacher

Everything Changes

2005-05-31T13:40:00.000-07:00

After recently receiving a promotion at work (which I will rave about later!) I have come to realize that I cannot escape the phrase, "She would have been proud of you, Amy" or "Mom would have loved to have been here for this".

I will hear it after every good thing that happens in my life. And I will wish every time that I could tell her face to face.

I know that time heals, but I don't this one feeling will ever change. There are so many "things" that will happen in my life that she was supposed to be a part of...... Anytime I've said, "I just wish I could tell my mom, ya know?" people always respond with "You still can!". I know that. Of course I can whisper up to the Heavens and talk to her about anything. It's just not the same.

I can't see the crow's feet wrinkle around her eyes as she smiles when I tell her I've been promoted.

I can't hear her voice exclaim, "CONGRATULATIONS AMY!".

I can't hug her tight and thank her for sticking by me, encouraging me to always do better and strive for more.

I can't join her for dinner to celebrate, raising our glasses of white wine and clinking them together as we bond like mother and daughter should.

While there are many other people in my life that I was happy to share this news with and celebrate with, there is just no substitute for my mom. She was so special and so supportive...... and I will continue to thank God every day for placing me under her and my dad's care.

And so the healing process moves on, changing me........molding me........ confusing me.........and showing me just how gentle I need to be with myself and with others.

Ski Boots

2005-05-12T23:02:00.000-07:00

That's how it all started. A church ski trip and some old fashioned, clunky, lace-up ski boots.

Everyone wanted to hurry up to the top of the hill and start cutting through the fresh snow, but he stopped to help her lace 'em up. She wanted them tighter, then she wanted the left one looser - then tighter again - then looser - and then tighter still. Little did he know that her indecisiveness would be a part of his daily life for years to come.

He was instantly intrigued and had to spend more time with this picky, goofy yet gentle and elegant woman. He ended up spending 35 glorious years with her....until the Lord took her home.

Last night was the first time I had heard the story of how my mom and dad met in such detail. I'm glad I know..... it gives me something to giggle at - just picturing my mom complaining about the tightness of her boots, laughing nervously and flashing him that amazingly beautiful smile.

Her smile and her wisdom is what I miss the most.

Dumpster Fire

2005-04-19T21:37:00.000-07:00

Had a little excitement on Sunday evening. Around 9:30pm or so, I was helping Erik take the trash out. Well, as we were walking up to the big, green dumpster I noticed something was unusual..... There was something on fire in the dumpster! Erik bolted upstairs to get his phone and his fire extenguisher. He tried to put it out while I called the fire department, but right then, it went from a smoldering potential-problem into a big, ugly problem. Erik and I backed far away as the dumpster quickly caught on fire...... (my heart was pounding)...... Then, a tree that stood over the dumpster caught on fire and it was just like in the movies! I heard a swoosh sound and then a "ssssssssssssssssst" crackle, as the pine-needles burned. I was nervous and excited all at the same time.

Finally, the fire truck showed up and quickly put it all out....... no one was hurt and it was not believed to be foul play. Probably just some ignorant fool who threw their cigarette butt in the dumpster paying no mind to what just may be in there.

Never had to call 911 before that...... I was kinda proud of myself. I stayed calm and listened as best I could. Anyways, after the fire was out Erik and I just went back up to his apartment - no one seemed to interested in asking us any questions, so we just went back upstairs. No harm done, but still rather invigorating :-)

I'm Back

2005-04-17T17:08:00.000-07:00

The amount of free time I've had lately and the desire to write here have not been able to co-exist lately, but here I am :-)

I just got home from a co-workers house - she's moving to Tulsa, OK and I've been helping her pack up her things. It felt nice to help someone out.... people have been SO helpful and wonderful to me lately, I needed to return the kindness. In cleaning out her office she found some old business cards with a quote written on them - I found thought-provoking and thought I'd share.

"Excellence is the result of

Caring more than others think is wise

Risking more than others think is safe

Dreaming more than others think is practical and

Expecting more than others think is possible"

I will certainly miss her. Oh, her name is Rhonda and she's a blessing to have in my life (she reminds me of my mother a lot - from their placemats to their clothes pins to their choice in books - she and my mom had a lot in common). Speaking of my mother, I had a dream about her the other night. She was waving at me from a red car as she drove by a bench I was sitting on. She was smiling that beautiful smile and letting her hair down. I love those dreams..... I always feel good when I wake up. Some nights there are awful dreams that I wake from feeling anxious and sad. I usually just take a few deep breaths and maybe turn on the tv or something until I can fall back asleep. I must say that even though there are good days and awful days, I've never felt more alive that I do now. I feel EACH moment that passes and worry about wasting it. Life is so very precious and for the first time ever, I'm realizing just how much I have left to do in this world. I will carry on my mom's legacy - I'm not exactly sure how yet, but the determination is there. I miss my mother dearly and I'm just beginning this whole process, but I'll tell you one thing..... you really find out just how much your friends and family care for you in a time like this. I have been overwhelmed with support and kindness shown to me in the last few weeks...... I thank God for each of those people every day......

Phew! I wasn't expecting to write that much! I'm going to be late for dinner with Shannon so I must go :-)

Catherine Hawkinson

2005-03-28T13:12:00.000-08:00

I haven’t posted in a long time, huh?

Well, some things that have happened that have either taken up too much of my physical time to blog, or my emotional state was too intense and I just couldn’t write.

My mother passed away on Wednesday, March 22nd after battling Liver and Colon-Rectal Cancer since November, 2004. Today is the first day I’m writing about my mother’s illness. I tried several times, but couldn’t find any words in the English language to do her justice. My brother (Jeff) wrote a beautiful tribute called, “A Mom Remembered” which I will post below. He wrote everything I couldn’t and did it perfectly.

This is and has been a huge struggle for me. I was not supposed to outlive my mother (nor were HER parents, who are in their 80’s). I did get a chance to say goodbye before she slipped into her coma. I sat by her hospital bed, holding her hand and just talking quietly. We talked about memories and good times. She also told me to go be a faithful wife and a good mom to my children. One thing keeps playing in my head, she said, “Amy, you were born to be a mother – when the time comes, I know you’ll be an excellent mother.”. My reply was, “That’s because I had a excellent mother myself.” We then giggled and hugged. It was tearful and awful and unfathomable, but I am SO glad we had that time together. Without it, this process would be nearly impossible. It’s funny, I spent all my teen years saying that I was going to do things differently and raise my family differently and not be like my mother. Now, all I want, more than anything in the world, is to be just like her. Kind, intelligent, patient, motivated, faithful and witty only scratch the surface.

There is definitely a bittersweet feeling in my heart. On one hand, I feel so robbed of an adult relationship with my mother. I mean, I had a safe, fun, loving and nurturing childhood with my mom right by my side. There were swim meets, skinned elbows, choir performances, homework dates, first breakups and first loves. But there are events that my mom will miss. Like my wedding day, having dinner at my first home, my first pregnancy and birth, grandkids, graduations, family vacations and so much more.

Then on the flipside, I find comfort in knowing that she is in Heaven, running around with her friends that went before her. She’s pain free, laughing, smiling and singing….. in a perfect body. She’s met Jesus! Can you imagine?! How wonderful it must be up there…. No crime, no tears, no hatred or unfaithfulness or letdowns, no failing, no disappointment. Only happiness, joy and light. THAT is what keeps me going hour to hour – knowing that she is safe and no longer suffering.

God has been so faithful to me, easing my tears and showing me that I have a wonderful family that wants to support and love me. I have also been blessed to have my partner-in-crime, Erik, in my life. He has been SO supportive of my mood swings, my random crying and the ever-changing updates on my mom’s condition while she was still alive. It is so refreshing to have a patient, kind and lovable man by my side. Three years and going strong! Thank you, baby. You’ve been by my side and by my mom’s bedside and for that, I am so thankful. My adoration and respect for you has been growing in my heart.

Below, you will find the tribute Jeff wrote about my mom. This will also be read at her memorial service on Saturday, April 2nd.

A Mother Remembered

Three children have the privilege of calling her “Mom.” Three children born not from her womb, but from her heart and the abundance of love she had to give.

Our mother epitomized the caring and nurturing qualities that define motherhood. When we ran home with skinned knees, troubled minds or hurt feelings, she was there to mend our wounds, calm our fears, and restore our hearts. When we needed a supporter, our mother was there to cheer us on during the many football games, concerts, plays, horse shows, and swim meets. Win or lose, she was there to celebrate with us in our victories, and to console us in our defeats.

Our mother taught us the qualities and manners of being good citizens in the world. She taught us to eat our vegetables, chew with our mouth closed, say “please” and “thank you,” and wash behind our ears. More importantly, our mother taught us the virtues of being a follower of Christ, demonstrating the fruit of the spirit – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. She introduced us to the unfailing love of Jesus, the only love stronger than the love she possessed for us.

Our mother modeled the biblical attributes of what a wife and mother should be. While there are always disagreements in any marriage, there was no conflict or strife in our home, as our mother was committed to defer to her husband’s leadership and face the results together, for better or worse. She had the courage to discipline us when we strayed from the house rules. While we did not believe it at the time, her lament of “this hurts me more than it hurts you” was indeed true (especially given our tendency to pad our behinds with paperback books). While we were in need of her maternal guidance and direction, she sacrificed her own dreams and ambitions and turned her full attention to raising us properly.

Once we were all in school, she had the courage and determination to go back to school herself, earning graduate degrees in counseling and school administration on her way to a Masters degree in Psychology. For the last six years, our mother devoted herself as a school psychologist to helping children develop, mature and cope with the many challenges of adolescence. We are proud that she was able to share the same teaching and nurturing we received with another generation of children.

We will cherish the precious memories of our mother – relaxing together with a good book on the sailboat … riding bikes along the Marymoor trial … digging clams at the beach cabin … sitting down to a home-cooked meal … playing a frenzied game of Nertz … singing around the piano. We will also cherish the memory of those everyday foibles that makes us unique human beings – her propensity to lose her keys and glasses … her penchant for changing orders at a restaurant when the waiter scampered by with another patron’s enticing selection … her genuinely irrational fear of jellyfish.

While we will deeply miss the love and encouragement that only a mother can provide, we are grateful that God placed each of us under her care and that she was given enough time on this earth to gently guide us into adulthood. Born from her heart, her memory now lives in ours.

Please keep me and my family in your prayers and we grieve the loss of a wife, a mother, a sister, a daughter, an aunt, a cousin and a friend. Thank you…….

2005-03-01T06:31:00.000-08:00

I was going to try to write something beautifully poetic to celebrate our 3rd anniversary, but I just haven't had the time to sit down and let it come to me. But I didn't want to just not write anything......So, here's my love poem.

Way to go, baby! We made it!
And every moment has been worth it....

Love is personified in you
And no matter where life takes us,
We will always be a part of each other

:-)

So, happy 3 year anniversary to us!

(I guess I should go get ready for work, seeing that it's 6:40am....later!)

2005-02-20T10:06:00.000-08:00

What a great day :-) God is so good, life is so good, the sun is out, and oh yeah, I'm headed out the door to go drive my new car.

Wait, should I say it again? Some of you may not believe me.

I'm headed out the door to go drive my new car!!!!!!!!!

For those of you who have known me for more than 5 years, you've seen me drive a car. For those who haven't, you've been driving my ass all around town that whole time, and to you, I am truly appreciative :-)

But now, Amy has grown up and bought herself a car! No more bumming rides! As you can tell, I'm pretty stoked. I finally saved up enough money to buy a car. It's an oldie but a goodie.

It's an '87 Honda Accord LX, 4 door, automatic, silver/gray, 157K miles, power everything and working cruise control (which has ended up to be my new favorite thing). It's clean, reliable and is going to work great as a little commuter car. Hard to believe I'm driving a car that was built when I was in 1st Grade, but it runs like a champ!

Anyways, I gotta go. Sun's out, time is awastin'!!!!!

I hope you all are having as spectacular of a day as I am :-)

Another Vday Come and Gone

2005-02-16T16:20:00.000-08:00

*SIGH*

What a wonderful day.....

I was working away, too busy as usual, and here comes this delivery man with an enormous, fabulous boquet of roses in a beautiful vase. Now, almost everyone I work with is married or at least seroiusly dating, so I didn't automatically assume they were for me (I was hoping, of course).

Sure enough, the man said, "I have a delivery for an Amy Hawkinson"

My cheeks immediatly turned bright red and I smiled so big I'm sure the UBuildIt wing across the way saw it :-) It was a dozen long-stem roses just for me, from my sweetie. It was the perfect mid-day surprise.... I had been delivered balloons before at work, but never flowers. Very thoughtful (thank you baby!).

We then spent the evening together, cooking one of our favorite meal (steak fajitas!), eating by a roaring fire and nice music, with candles all around.

On Tuesday, I was asked to describe my Valentines Day..... I said, "I can sum it up in 3 words"

Perfect........Perfect........and Perfect.

February is going to be a romantic month!!! We just had Vday and now we're going to be celebrating our 3 year anniversary on the 28th! We're SO excited to go away for a weekend. I think we're going to a nice hotel and ordering a bunch of room service (strawberrries and champagne anyone?). Maybe getting a massage or a facial..... pretty damn excited...

Alrighty, have to get back to work!

2005-02-07T20:57:00.000-08:00

"We grow great by dreams. All big men are dreamers. They see things in the soft haze of a spring day or in the red fire of a long winter's evening. Some of us let these great dreams die, but others nourish and protect them; nurse them through bad days till they bring them to the sunshine and light which comes always to those who sincerely hope that their dreams will come true."

Woodrow Wilson

Finally!

2005-01-27T18:19:00.000-08:00

Good news!

On Wednesday, Erik started his first day at Northwest BMW, located in Fife (just about 40 mins away)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We're all very excited about the fact that he didn't have to move out of Washington again :-)

After a long battle he's back in Seattle, has a great new career starting and is around the people he loves...... can't really get much better than that.

:-)

"It's kind of fun to do the impossible"
- Walt Disney

Leno is on, it must be late

2005-01-21T01:06:00.000-08:00

Alrighty. I'm watching Leno, who has Snoop Dogg as a guest. I'm a fan....I used to listen to his music back in the day and I think I even remember owning a Snoop t-shirt :-) It's just something he said tonight make me think. He was plugging his new youth football league and was asking for the community to give a donation to make it happen.

Um, why would I donate money to Snoog Dogg?

Trust me, I'm all about getting involved with the community and donationg to a good cause.....but why would I donate money to a millionaire to support his new football league? He has millions. Millons. Think about it.

I'll give my hard-earned $100 to the local YMCA before I'll donate to a millionaire's new league. Is it great to start a youth league as a millionaire? Of course. Is it a little strange to ask for donations? Um, yeah.

There, I feel better. Goodnight!

YAWN

2005-01-18T11:17:00.000-08:00

Well, I'm here at work, it's 11:15 and I'm yawing like crazy! Our annual convention is this week in Tampa, so I'm here with 3 other women. It's nice and quiet around here.... no one asking me how to print on letterhead (for the millionth time) or telling me the printer is jammed again or asking if FedEx has picked up yet..... I've got plenty of work to do, but I can just do it at my own pace now, with little interruption :-)

Anyways, just taking a little break. Gotta get going!

It's The Little Moments That Count

2005-01-11T13:30:00.000-08:00

Sunday, January 9th - 4:45am

It was such a perfect morning.....

Erik and I were on our way from his house to my house (a meer 2 blocks) , driving in the beautiful and long anticipated snow. Since my landlord has eliminated visitor parking, Erik has to park across the street at the Happy Church (and yes, that is the real name of the church).

Well, we found the street deserted and discovered it was really fun to walk down the middle of the road, throwing snow at each other :) Soon, we were standing in the middle of 132nd street, kissing, with the snow falling all around us. No noise, no cars and all the romance of Harlequin novel. A perfect moment. Nothing else existed but our breath in the air and the little twinkle in our eyes.

I live for little moments like that. Makes me feel alive.

Happy New Year!

2005-01-02T11:16:00.000-08:00

Lots of things come with a new year. Resolutions, new payroll, changes..... yes, changes.... Well, there's been a big change here lately. At the last minute, Bellevue BMW changed their minds and decided not to hire Erik. It's pretty screwed up, too. They called on Thursday morning, 4 days before Erik was to report for his first day of work. So, he was pretty damn angry and pretty disappointed.... I mean, he had already gotten clearance to work there before he even left New Jersey! And acting on faith that they wouldn't back out (given the fact there was a signed letter from the Bellevue BMW president that they were hiring him and verbal confirmation of that fact), he drove all the way across the country with all his stuff, moved into an apartment and was going to start this great new job. In addition, of course he wasn't looking for work. So, basically what I'm trying to say is that Bellevue really screwed things up.

Erik is a smart and capable man, he'll figure something out. But as of a couple weeks ago, no one in the Puget Sound area was hiring. So, it looks like there's a good chance that he'll have to move to find work. Let's hope something opens up so he doesn't have to.

So, we're just trying to make the best of the time we have now and we'll see what happens. It's been great to spend so much time together, but it looks like it may be short lived. I guess we'll just have to be happy with the time God gives us :)

In other news, it's been SO nice having a whole week off of work. They need to do it more often :) Have to go back to work tomorrow, but that's okay. We'll be pretty damn busy playing catchup so the day should go by pretty fast.

Anyways, I've got to make some breakfast and get all set up to watch some football!

GO SEAHAWKS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Is Christmas Here Already?

2004-12-24T10:30:00.000-08:00

Wow. Merry Christmas everyone! I can't even believe it's Christmas Eve...... It's been an interesting year. Wonderful and awful. Amazing and devastating. Fun and completely boring. All rolled into one.

I can say now though, one of the best things that has happened this year is Erik moving back home :) It's only been 3 days but I can say it's just like a dream. To have him here to hold, go on a date with, cuddle with, talk to..... It's back to being like "the ol' times" with a whole new twist. More love, more experience, more excitement. So, we're feeling pretty damn thankful that he got a job here at Bellevue BMW and that we can finally be a regular couple again. Merry Christmas to us! hehehehe :)

In other news, I also have 10 straight days off of work, PAID! It's such a nice feeling to know that I can sleep in a little, watch my favorite soaps, spending some time with Erik, actually get some cleaning done. It's going to be a great way to end the year.

Well, I'm off to get ready to finish my Christmas shopping....er....uh....I mean, start my Christmas shopping (opps!).

YAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

2004-12-10T13:58:00.000-08:00

ERIK WILL BE COMING HOME AND STAYING HOME!!

HE GOT A JOB AT BELLEVUE BMW!!

It wasn't a sure thing until Thursday afternoon.... no more waiting, no more wondering... he'll be living in Kirkland (just a few blocks from me!) and he'll be starting his new career as a BMW technician. AND, we're going to have a normal, dating relationship again! So, thank you to all who kept us in your thoughts and prayers.

WE MADE IT! :-)

Here's what the next few weeks are looking like:
Dec 17th - He graduates! (also, happy birthday to me!!)
Dec 19th - Him and his dad jump in his loaded truck and set out on I-90 to make the
trek across the whole damn continent back to Seattle
Approx Dec 22/23 - Erik arrives back home!!!!!!!!!!
Jan 3rd - He starts his first day of work!

Anyways, the whole long distance relationship is over! We can finally just BE :)

Well, lunch break is over....gotta get back to work. More later!

Catch up

2004-11-26T19:31:00.000-08:00

Wow, it's been longer than I thought since I last wrote here..... little busy with the last couple weeks of my class and putting in some OT at work. Well, lets get right to the updates :)

Erik will be home in about 28 days!!! I can't even believe it! A year and a half, 18 months, 72 weeks, approx 540 days.....we kept our relationship going strong even from a couple thousand miles apart. And now, we get to be together again. Well, mostly. Erik has a few prospects for jobs in the Northwest area. The BWM dealerships are in Salem, Portland and Beaverton, Oregon and the other possible one is in Bellevue, right here in good ol' Washington. So, we're keeping our fingers crossed that Bellevue offers him a job! It would be SO great.....finally, a normal dating relationship! I've missed all those little luxuries that some couples take for granted. Ya know, like sitting on the couch in pj's, watching a funny movie. Or getting all sexy and going out on a date. Or just waking up together, morning breath and all :) After going w/o all that stuff for so long, Erik and I are just looking forward to the basics... like just spending time together. So, for those that pray, please say a little prayer that BWM of Bellevue offers him the job!!! THANKS!! :)

Work has been quite busy.... our yearly convention for all our Franchise Partners around the country is coming up in January. So, I've been busy preparing materials and supporting the rest of the Home Office. I've been at UBuildIt for 9 months now, and just like any job, there are negatives (like washing coffee mugs). But I really enjoy working there :) Good concept, good vision and great people to work with. I think I can put up with washing some glasses to be involved with a great company. So, that's about it for work....

I guess the only other thing to report is that my online class for Excel is almost done!! I'm pretty sure I'll finish with at least a 3.5 gpa. It's been a good class. I enjoyed doing this online, mostly because I got to study whatever hours I wanted. So, I feel pretty good about going back to school. I'm already looking at what classes are being offered online for next quarter :)

I guess that's about it! I think I'm going to cook dinner now. Maybe some stroganoff.... mmmm :)

Giggles

2004-11-09T20:24:00.000-08:00

I read this in readers digest and had the giggles for 5 full mins :)

Have you run out of excuses for missing work? After all, how many times can you kill off Aunti Sadie? The staffing agency Accountemps asked executives for some unusual excuses their employees have used....

"I'll be out this afternoon on job interviews"

"My cat has hairballs"

"I need time to find myself" (That's my personal fav)

"I'm being hauled off to jail"

"I need a leave of absence to try another job. But if it doesn't work out, I'd like to come back"

Actual excuses given.... hard to believe. I mean, "I need time to find myself" ?????? I think I'll use that one next month :)

Well, I'm off to do some more homework.... woohoo! um, not. But hey, that's life I guess!

Mmmm Mmmm Good

2004-11-06T22:49:00.000-08:00

What a perfect day.....

I jumped on the bus and headed to downtown Kirkland today. Destination: Tan Tan Tan Salon and Spa. I bought a great package deal for their grand opening.

First, I was wrapped up in these soft, hot panels, wearing sweats and a heavy sweatshirt and got to watch season 3 of Sex in the City while sweating away all the toxins in my body. Then, after being treated to free Evian and a blueberry muffin, I was lead down the hall to sit in the most comfortable tanning bed I've ever been in. After 12 mins of that, my pampering continued with a 90 min full body massage.... the room was perfect. Dark, with mirrors all around, live ivy growing everywhere and Mendelsson playing in the back ground. My massage was glorious and painful all rolled into one. I could literally feel the tension leaving my upper neck.... wonderful, exquisite, relaxing and worth every penny. I then received a pedicure and another great foot massage. My day at the spa was over, but the fun activities didn't end there.

Even though it was gray, cold and slightly drizzling, I decided to walk around downtown and look in all the little shops. I walked through old consignment shops with way over-priced used clothes, had a great lunch at World Wraps and saw some of the most gorgeous artwork I've ever seen. I'm not an artist (I can barely draw acceptable stick figures) and I don't know anything technical about art. All I know is that art touches my somewhere deep inside. I can get lost in a beautiful landscape. It's no wonder that nice art galleries have benches in front of some pieces.

Check out www.mangelsen.com to see what I'm talking about.

Alright, I'm off to do my homework! Then to dreamland.... then up to watch the Seahawks and go shopping at Ikea with Shannon. Ahhhhh....what a great weekend.

Thanks Dad and Other Stuff :)

2004-10-28T22:37:00.000-07:00

My computer is up and running again, upgraded to Windows XP no less, all thanks to my father :) So, thanks dad..... love you!!

Not a whole lot else going on....UBuildIt is keeping me extremely busy though. I was actually offered a whole Saturday of overtime this weekend! So, I'm actually looking forward to working on Sat, I can wear jeans and bring in my own music. There won't be any phones to worry about, no questions to answer about how to unjam the printer or "Amy, could you please do this in an hour?" :) I will actually be able to get my work done!

Life is good otherwise..... Erik will be done with school in less than 7 weeks (YAH!), I bought myself a cheap, little digital camera, I'm actually AHEAD in my school work (which is monumental for me) and life with my new roommate is good! My kitties are driving me crazy though. I love 'em, but man, it's "let me out - let me in - feed me- let me out - let me in- feed me again!" over and over, now that the weather is crappy. When it's warm out they're barely ever inside. Oh well, I guess it's the price you pay to have 3 adorable, always ready to cuddle kitties, huh? :)

That's about it! Read this today and loved it....

“I love those who yearn for the impossible.”- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

UGH....but still smiling :-)

2004-10-27T18:40:00.000-07:00

Well... my computer chose a great time to crash....right when I'm trying to get AHEAD in school work :) I think I got a pretty severe virus and I'm not sure if my hard drive is going to make it....but hey, these things happen, right? :)

So, I'm writing from a computer at work..... about to go look at a total lunar eclipe. I guess there won't be one until 2007. Woohoo! :) Should be cool to look at though.

Dad's here, gotta go! More when my stubborn computer decides to be alive....

Things that are just Wrong....

2004-10-20T21:24:00.001-07:00

- Riding the bus the other day, I witnessed something unusual. I watched the gas prices rise right before my eyes. I thought to myself, "I wonder how bad this guy feels changing the price signs right in front of people pulling in to gas up?". Supreme Unleaded went from $2.09 to $2.19! Ick! Gas should never be that high, it's just wrong....

- I happened to glance at the brand-tag in my underwear this morning and the brand name was Peeping Tom. I know it's just a tag, but common.... couldn't they come up with something a little more intelligent?

- Blue milk. The ad targeted moms who couldn't get their kids to drink regular milk. My children will drink whatever milk is put in front of them, thank-you-very-much. I never got a choice. I ate or drank what was in front of me or I ended up hungry. Made me appreciative and respecful :)

- Sarah Michelle Gellar in yet ANOTHER scary halloween movie. It's too bad too.... "The Grudge" looks like a pretty good movie. Too bad she's in it. Hasn't Hollywood figured out that she's a horrible actress yet?

- Bulk, mass produced toilet paper. Ladies, you'll understand this one :) I mean, it's like sandpaper! I'm just waiting for Scott or MD to come out with toilet paper that feels like heaven. THAT would make them a lot of money.

- Regis Philbin recording an album. What, is having the most hours logged on TV not enough for you? Enough already!

And lastly,

- Yankee's fans throwing bottles at THEIR OWN players! Game 6 of the ALCS game vs. the Red Sox. They had to halt the game for about 10 mins and bring out police with riot gear on! I mean, common! I understand that the phrase "It's just a game" doesn't work for the players. That's how they make their living, it's how they bring home the bacon and for some of them it's a deciding factor on if they come back next year or not. But when did it change for the spectators? Don't get me wrong, I'm an active fan... I yell and stamp by feet and mutter obscenities (with the season the M's had, how could I not?) But, it think violence against the very players you "love" is just pathetic. That's my two cents :)

CONGRATS TO THE BOSTON RED SOX! :) The only team in major league history to come back from 0-3 in the championship series to force a game seven and 2, to win the championship. They were up 6 to 0 in the top of the second on a grandslam! Great game, cool for them, watched history in the making.

Time to call it a night :)

Appropriately Untitled

2004-10-05T21:34:00.000-07:00

I am evolving.....

Constantly trying to mold myself into the who I want to be....

I am not perfect, (boy, am I not perfect).....

But I'd like to think that I'm making my way on that journey of becoming the woman I want to be, or rather the woman I am capable of being.

So, to my fellow women who are finding themselves occasionally stuck between who we are and who we want to be, just keep on keepin' on......

And thank you to my mother who never lets me forget how far I've come. You're an inspiration and I can only hope that I can become half the woman you are. I love you.

Amazing Photography Sites

2004-10-04T21:47:00.000-07:00

I have recently become obsessed with finding interesting photography on the internet. I've been viewing web page after web page after web page, finding beautiful photography of all kinds..... landscapes (my favorite), people, animals, infarred photography, architecture....all kinds of things. I'm going to list a couple websites below. Please take a moment to view some of their galleries. You may just find something that makes you smile....

Or makes you think.....

Or inspires you....

Whatever it may do, it's worth a few moments, isn't it? :)

http://www.gallerysyme.com/

http://www.donwnelson.com/default.htm

http://www.e-libertyart.com/english/homepage_en.htm

http://www.barbarajordan.com/gallery.html

http://www.visionlightgallery.com/?Referral=O-NH

http://www.worldvisionsphoto.com/

Late Night Smiles

2004-10-03T01:40:00.000-07:00

It's 1am and I'm not the least bit tired. Which isn't that unusual now that I think about it :) But I do know what's been keeping me up tonight. I was on the phone with an old friend earlier today and she asked me "Amy, how did you and Erik stay together in a long distance relationship for a year and a half?" The easy answers are lots of phone calls, a sense of humor and a willingness to be virtually single for a long time. The deeper reasons are far more profound. Love. Commitement. Trust. Respect. Erik and I committed to see this thing through and we have :)

We have not been without our struggles, trust me, there have been a few. Time constraints on the phone, very tired calls, moodiness for the both of us, power struggles and a few fiesty moments. But at the end of the day, those things were resolved and we learned just a little more about each other. I have learned that Erik can be a moody, stressed-out perfectionist :) And he has learned that I can be a demanding, nitpicky, sometimes loony girlfriend :) But through all that, we also learned about the best of ourselves. We're patient, kind and loving towards one another. We treat each other with respect and have also learned to laugh at ourselves. No relationship is perfect, but I think we're doing pretty damn good.

I want to take this moment to commend Erik on his efforts to further his life. Since he has left Seattle he's delt with the Phoenix heat, an apt all alone, being jumped by big black guys, waking up at 4am every single day and not coming home until 8 at night, dealing with a crap load of school work while holding down a near full time job, being involved with an accident at work which landed him in the ER and STILL ended up finishing strong in Phoenix, leaving with a perfect attendence record and 7 Student of the Phase awards (coveted by UTI students).

Then.... on to New Jersey! He's attending a school that will certify him as a BMW technician with the ability to be promoted to Master Tech in a few years. That also means that he's doing extremely advanced, challenging work and still bringing home stellar grades. I am so very proud of him, as is everyone else who loves him. Baby, we're all excited for you to come home!!!

But, back to the point of all this.... long distance relationships. They're difficult, they're demanding and they're 100% worth it. I was looking online for resources and found this site. I would encourage anyone who is in a long distance relationship or having to contemplate one, to visit this site. It's very encouraging while still sticking to the realities of LD relationships. Here's the link: http://www.sblake.com/index.phtml

My advice: Have patience with your partner, it goes a long way. And remember time flies faster than you think. The individual days have gotton very long and verrrrrrry lonely, but when I realize Erik has been gone for almost 17 months, it's FLOWN by! He'll be home in 12 weeks..... seems so short compared to the 68 weeks he's been gone. WE CAN'T WAIT :)

Well, those are my thoughts on long distance relationships....take it or leave it. Erik and I are just living proof that it's possible to stay together and possible to still be happy and in love. And good luck to any couple trying to do this! Trust me, you can.

I think I'm done with the sappiness now :) Goodnight....

Calm before the storm

2004-09-29T19:00:00.000-07:00

Phew! It I had known that my life would be so chaotic this month, I would've gotten more sleep in August :) Funny, how life can change so quickly.....it's been an up-down-up-down-up-down and then up, down and up once again! Overall, I can't complain. Actually, I don't think anyone can complain unless they live in Florida...

Some of the negative things that have happened recently:
- lots of changes at work, which can cause anyone to be stressed. Plus, UBuildIt is getting bigger and we're experiencing growing pains. So, it's a good thing with some tough changes.

- I found out that if I wanted to change apts w/in my complex, I have to say goodbye to my 3 wonderful kitties. Not sure if I'm prepared to do that. In fact, I'm not!

- I broke my freezer trying to de-ice it :) Have a new one now, but for about a week, Dayna and I had to walk to another apt's fridge to get our food

- Upgrading my computer cost me an unexpected bundle (I had to for my online class).

- I had a crazy experience with a Metro bus driver.... he started going off on some teenage girl for putting graffiti on his bus. Well, lets just say he skipped being a little upset and went straight to enraged. We sat stopped in rush hour traffic for 15 mins while she cleaned the seat. I didn't really get involved until he was physically threatening to her and calling her nasty names. I reported him.... hope he gets fired.

BUT!!!!

There are some really positive things that happened too!
- I'm in the first week on my first college course since 2000. It's an Excel Spreadsheet class. I'm pretty stoked about being back in school :-)

- Erik gave me some really great news: he'll be graduation a week sooner than originally thought!!! So, on Dec 17th (my bday, go figure) he'll be graduating and heading out on the road back home (say some prayers, driving from NJ to WA through the midwest in the middle of winter will be challenging). So, HE'LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS!!! (I can't wait baby!)

- I had an amazing, near perfect review at work.... got a raise!!! woohoo!

- I've been working out and for the first time in a VERY long time, my size 12 dress pants are falling down when I walk! And I'm not even on a diet.... I cut out fast food and take out chineese, exercise and walk to work at least 3 days/week. I'm on a roll!

- Despite the cost, my computer is upgraded with a much larger RAM capacity.... making my life much more efficient

- I'm on track to buy a vehicle by the end of the year! Which, for those of you who know me, is a HUGE accomplishment. My savings account and I never really understood each other. But now, it's all good :)

I'm sure there's some things I'm forgetting, but that's the short of it. I'm now off to watch the Mariners to see if Ichiro can break a major league record... 3 hits to go!!!!

(by the way, to those of you who have experienced my crabiness lately, I'm truly sorry and you can expect differently in the days to come. Love you all. And to my baby.... you're the best thing that has ever happened to me. Can't wait 'till you come home! Smooches!)

For my love

2004-09-26T21:55:00.000-07:00

I hear them whisper your name
Those mighty winds that blow
I know that you are close at hand, the wind just told me so
The direction from whence they blew, I am not sure I know
For only when I hear your name, am I sure the winds did blow
Caressing my face with a whisper ...calling out your name
The winds of delight entice me and I will never be the same

I will follow the singing wind
Where it leads me I do not know
For the winds that blew you from me ...will take me where I must go
Upward into the hills, calmly across the sea
Hold on my love, I'm coming ...The wind has beckoned me
Free to wander and search this earth, no matter how far that may be
Free to follow the whispering wind ...until it blows me back to thee

You must be getting closer now, I feel you in the breeze
Come and find me, my sweet and distant love
Or the loneliness of winter, will bring me to my knees

I want you to grasp my hand in yours and softly speak my name
And as I look into the whispering winds
My vision is us.....together at last.... the day finally came

Ha! I did it!

2004-09-22T19:23:00.000-07:00

I'm enrolled in school!!!!! For those of you who thought I never would.... I just proved you all wrong! Actually, I proved myself wrong. Signing up for an online Excel Spreadsheet class with Shoreline Community College is somewhat a small, personal victory for me. I've been putting of school for 4 years now, for many different reasons. I finally worked up the courage and the means to go.... so, I'm excited! Class start Monday 9/27.... I'm looking foward to trying an online class. I'm on my computer all the time anyways, so using it as a tool to learn is a perfect fit.

So for today, I'm proud of myself. I can take a day, sit back and say, "Amy, ya did it". I guess now I have to do well in the class, right? :) I will..... I know I'm smart enough. And even though it's been really long time since I've been in school, I know this experience will be MUCH different. The main reason being age. Trying to do Running Start my junior and senior year of high school didn't prove to work, mainly because of my immaturity and lack of depth. Now, I've been around the block a couple times. Wiser, smarter and definitly more responsible.

ANYWAYS! That's it for now! I've got much, much more to write about.....but later.... time for a nice bubble bath and a book. Nighty night!

Youngly Getting Older

2004-09-08T20:10:00.000-07:00

I'm not old... I'm just shy of 23. But there are days when I feel old. I guess it was almost 2 months ago now that I was watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles with some kids, when I heard Donatello say, "Hey, did you steal my Mp3 player?" It caught me off guard! :) Since when did those fiesty, green warriors have Mp3 players??????

Another example: I was talking to a 11 year old and she had NO IDEA who Garfield was. All she wanted to talk about was Pokemon!! :) She's missing out on the fattest, cutest, hungriest little orange kitty that ever was.

And what topped it all off was when my new roommate, Dayna, revealed that she had the original Nintendo!!! I got the nostalgic urge and plugged it into my tv. I was HOOKED on Super Mario 3 for 2 hours! I forgot how fun crushing little mushrooms and hitting my head against bricks was! I then got stuck on World 7 (got lost) and gave up. Then......It was time for Tetris! I can't believe kids today won't experience the addicting monatony of cheesy arabian music and falling bricks....or the inability to save your game (GOD FORBID!) or the simplicity of 5 buttons on a controller instead of 10. What a sad, sad world we've become :) hehehe

But then again, I'm only 22. There's no telling what kids will be missing in 10 years.... Hell, kids in 10 years won't even know what Pokemon is :)

ANYWAYS! I'm doing thinking for the day.... Have sleep to catch....

Meg Ryan

2004-09-06T11:14:00.000-07:00

She's one of my favorite actors and said this at some point in her career.

"Love is not a decision your brain makes. It's a feeling you know somwhere else and your brain catches up. But love challenges you in areas you need to be challenged. It rests somewhere in not knowing what's going to happen. That's what I love."

(Can't you just hear her cute little voice and see that adorable smile with that twinkle in her eye? You can, cantcha?) :- )

Melissa's Wedding

2004-09-05T19:46:00.000-07:00

Awwww.... the wedding.... it was so great :) No major problems, no fights and they made it throught the vows! Being her bridesmaid was a unique and wonderful experience that I'll never forget. The Maid of Honor was Andrea and the 2 bridesmaid were Justina and myself.... both girls that I love to death. Andrea's hilarious and Justina is just so damn smart! Anyways, I think waiting for the ceremony to start was the worst part. By the time it started it was over... Melissa's grandpa walked her down the aisle, trying not to cry the whole way and JUST barely succeeding :) Her husband to be, Adrian, was beaming the whole time.... the groomsmen looked great and all us bridesmaids were busting out of our bodices! The vows were beautiful, the church was gorgeous and everyone was either smiling or crying. All in all, a perfectly excuted wedding, complete with slow dancing, cake mushing in the face and a cell phone ringing during the Maid of Honor's toast (it was her phone, which made it funny).

So, not to make the wedding about me (because while it was going on, Melissa and Adrian were the center of attention - as they should be) but I received the most flattering, amazing compliment I've ever gotten. Melissa's mom (Cheri) lives in Quebec and brought a wonderful friend down with her named Jaqueeve (Spelling!!!?). He's an extremely sweet, intelligent and hurmorous gay man who made me feel special yesterday. He walked up to me, asked me to twirl around in my gown, took my hand and in his sexy frenchish accent called me "A vision of beauty." I blushed so hard.... it made me feel so beautiful for the rest of the evening..... I mean, how often is it that I'm called a vision of beauty? It was great! Thanks Jaqueeve!!!

Anyways, I've got to finish rearranging my bedroom and clean out the hall closet still tonight. I'll probably be back later.....